An Ocean of Secrets
by Miss Flossy
Summary: Lucy Carrington is Dr Maturin's assistant. Aubrey hates her, the crew respect her, Mowett adores her. She's may not be perfect, but then none of them are. Prepare thyself... Story 1 in my Mowett's Adventures series! Huzzah!
1. Chapter 1 Absent Thoughts

Welcome to _An Ocean of Secrets_!

This is a piece of fiction based around the film _Master and Commander_, with nothing whatsoever to do with the books. Why did I write it? Well, originally, to make up for all those stories here on fanfiction about Pullings always getting the girl. It seems that nobody ever gives the other guys on the _Surprise_ a chance with the ladies, so I figured it was about time that changed...!

_An Ocean of Secrets_ started out as just romantic drabble, about a fictional female character (Lucy Carrington) on the Surprise during the Acheron mission, who has a special place in her heart for 2nd Lieutenant William Mowett (cute and cuddly teddy bear that he is!). Gradually as the story unfolded I added more characterization around the two main protagonists, which gave the story more depth. We learn that Stephen Maturin is hopeless with his emotions, Lucy is stubborn, proud and lonely, Captain Aubrey is a chauvinistic pig, Tom Pullings enjoys his wine a little too much, and William Mowett is not always the cool, calm gentleman he would have the crew believe he is! It's all very Danielle Steele, but I will admit it was a hell of a lot of fun to write! Note that the rating is for some of the more intimate stuff near the end of the story – it's not explicit, but some of the language is pretty direct, especially in the last chapters, and it ain't for the young ones. You have been warned.

Oh, and for those of you who may be concerned, Lucy Carrington is definitely NO Mary-Sue!

I really hope you enjoy reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I had such a good time writing this I have now begun a sequel of sorts, called _Abbotsleigh Park_, which continues the adventures of Mowett and Pullings, but with a bit more comedy and light hearted romance. I have started publishing it here on fanfiction, so make sure you have a read! I am also thinking of a story about Mr Howard, who, like Mowett, seems to be sorely ignored here on fanfiction...

In the meantime, I hope you enjoy _An Ocean of Secrets_, the story of Lucy Carrington, her adventures on the HMS _Surprise_, and her secret love for the officer who stole her heart.....

Luv ya's all!

Miss Flossy! xxxxx

* * *

Chapter 1 – Absent Thoughts

It had been a long day. Too long. Everything seemed to go wrong today, as if it was always destined to.

Lucy collapsed in a chair in the doctor's cabin, heaving the heaviest of sighs. Everything had been done; measurements and samples were taken, crew examined, stores accounted for. It seemed to Lucy that she had not stopped working since the sun had risen, but that for all she had done, she realized that in fact she had really done nothing. In the back of her mind she was a little bewildered as to why the doctor had requested these tasks be done today, when nothing really required their attention.

Her hard work was appreciated by the doctor, this she knew, although he did not always express it. Now he was sitting at his bench, pouring over his microscope, intently inspecting his latest water samples. She was used to his mumbling while he worked, sometimes in English, sometimes even in Spanish, although now her Spanish was almost good enough to understand him. She smiled in spite of herself; she loved watching him work. Something about the way he never gave up on a problem inspired her to always do her best, no matter how lonely, or uncomfortable, or exhausted she may feel.

Exhaustion. It was a though which brought her back to her current state of tiredness with lightening speed. She sighed again, reflecting on her achievements, and what was still required of her before the evening would finally be at an end.

"Tired, Lucy?"

The doctor looked up from his microscope. The lines on his face gave away his own exhaustion as he stared at her over the top of his wire spectacles. "You have worked very hard all day, haven't you? I don't think I have seen you sit still since dawn."

"No, sir, I am not tired" she replied wearily. "Just relieved to finally have the day come to an end." She put her head back and stared at the ceiling. Leaking again, she noted absently.

"I know what you mean" he sighed. "The past week has been one of painful normality. I know I have been trying to keep busy, and to keep you busy also. You seem of late to be somewhat out of sorts, my dear, and keeping you working always puts a smile on your face." He looked back to his microscope with renewed intensity.

Lucy turned to him with a look of surprise, unaware until this moment that he had noticed her mood. The doctor was always a difficult book to read; you never really knew if he was listening or noticing anything you said or did, and so never really thought to hide your emotions from him. In truth he was very intuitive, something she should have realized long before her melancholy had become evident to him. Of course she had never spoken of it; Lucy's life and feelings were an ocean of secrets, and although the doctor was the closest thing she ever had to family, she hesitated when opening her heart to him, lest he should mention her feelings to the Captain, and then....who knows what would happen then.

"I am not out of sorts, Stephen," she said with attempted humility. "I am just trying to find my place in this floating prison. It's not easy sometimes, you know."

He paused, gazing at her over the top of his glasses. "Yes, I can understand that. Being one of only a handful of women on board does make it difficult for you, I am sure. Being my assistant can't make it any easier, but you know that the crew respect you and trust your judgment. You shouldn't need me to tell you that."

"No sir, I know that is true, and I thank God for it. Still, there are some times when I believe it would be a lot easier to be a man!" She laughed.

The doctor's eyebrows raised slightly. "No, Lucy, I could never imagine you a man. There is something about you which is peculiarly feminine, even in this floating prison, as you call it."

No, she could never be a man, she thought. What a terrible idea. Even though her life had been one of torment and struggle, she would never wish to change her sex, simply for the sake of making things easier. That was not her style. From the first time the doctor had seen her in that street in East London, shivering with cold and fever, he had seen something in her eyes which had intriegued him. Her strength, her courage, her intelligence, all shone through the filth that enshrouded her and gave her an inner glow that he could never quite explain. He had taken her in, given her shelter, and showed her the amazing world of medicine, and for Lucy, this was a dream come true. Her future was destined to be lived on the street, begging and looting, and eventually whoring for the sake of a penny or two; but the doctor had rescued her from that fate worse than death, and having showed her that helping others was something she too could achieve, she had taken hold of it with both hands and never let go. That was over 10 years ago, and though both of their lives had changed somewhat, she still relied on his teaching and care, as she would on the brother she never had, or the father who she might have known if he had not left her on the street to die.

Still, there were some things about Lucy that he didn't know, and never would. She had never spoken of love to him, perhaps because she though it was a little outside his realm of understanding. Certainly, she had seen him take on his share of lovers, but none had touched his mind as well as his heart, and Lucy had always wondered if there was ever a woman who could truly find affection with a man like Stephen Maturin. She knew that there would never be such a feeling between them, that was certain. She loved Stephen, to be sure, but not in a romantic way. He was never one to show the emotion that she craved from a man who could win her heart. Besides, her heart had been won by another long ago.

She roused herself from her thoughts and looked again at the doctor, still intent on his microscope. Smiling, she stood and stretched. "I am going to have dinner with the other girls tonight, Stephen. Is that alright with you?"

"Yes, yes, that's fine" he answered, not bothering to look up. "Have a nice evening."

"And you, sir" she replied. "Give the Captain and the officers my compliments." She added, knowing that the doctor was to dine in the Captain's Cabin with the senior members of the crew that night.

"Shall I give all of the officers your compliments, or just the one?" He asked from behind his microscope.

Lucy went pale. He knew. She didn't know how, but he knew. There was nothing for it. Thoughts raced through her head that never should have been entertained, but within a few seconds she had regained her composure, and saw the only way out.

"Why, all the officers of course, my dear doctor. I trust they are all well." She smiled at him and left the room, closing the door with a satisfied thud. Thank God that was over, she thought. But how did he know? Who had told him? Surely she had not given her feelings away so greatly. If he knew, then who else knew? Her mind raced though hundreds of thoughts as she absently made her way to the women's mess room. This was something she needed to discuss with Kitty, and quickly.


	2. Chapter 2 Interesting News

Chapter 2.

The girls had assembled in the mess by the time Lucy arrived, and the room was abuzz with activity. Although there were only a handful of women on board, it always amazed Lucy just how much noise they could actually make. _Women!_ she thought to herself, taking a seat at the table next to Kitty as little Maggie approached with the evening meal.

"Long day, eh?" Kitty asked her as she poured another jug of rum.

"Yes, you could say that," she replied absently. Lucy's mind was still on the doctor's question, and her mind drifted away from the activity around her. _"All of the officers, or just the one" he said. Why?_

"I said do you want some bread, Lucy?"

A voice disturbed her thoughts. It was Helen, standing over her with a basket of stale rolls. "Do you want some of these or not?"

"Yes, thank you" Lucy replied, taking a roll from the pile without altering her distant gaze.

Helen looked at her curiously, looked at Kitty, and looked at her again. "You alright, love?"

"Fine. Just tired. It's been a long day."

"Well, I've got some interesting news that may make it worth your while to stay awake a little longer" said little Maggie, grinning furiously over her cup.

Lucy inwardly sighed, casting a sidelong glance at Kitty. It was going to be a long night, she thought, and from her expression, Kitty agreed with her.

"What is this interesting news, then?" Lucy asked Maggie, dutifully taking the bait.

"Well, you know how some letters were collected at our visit to the coast last week? I never got one, damn it. My bloody husband wouldn't write to me if his life depended on it."

"Get to the point, Maggie" Kitty prompted.

"Oh, yes. Well, one of those letters was for Mr Mowett, and apparently it contained a very interesting proposal."

Lucy's gaze suddenly lost its distance, and she stared at Maggie intently. What was this? She had heard nothing. She new that William had received a letter, but she did not know its contents. What could be so interesting that Maggie would be interested in it? Why was Maggie privy to it, and she was not?

Instantly regaining her composure, she feigned an air of total calm. "Well, what was in this letter? Tell us, Maggie, if it is so interesting."

Maggie grinned knowingly. "Well, apparently his father, you know, Admiral Mowett, has arranged for him to wed one of the daughters of the Admiral Lord Pemberly. You know, those three pretty girls at the Governors banquet before we left Portsmouth? Lucky boy, he is. Those girls would each be worth at least ten thousand a year."

The other girls chatted with interest about this new snipped of gossip, but for Lucy, the room went black. Nothing was conscious to her; her mind was swimming with thoughts and emotions, and the room would not stop spinning. Suddenly she felt a hand on her knee, and realized it was Kitty's. It brought her back to Earth, with a gentle squeeze to tell her that all would be alright.

"We'll talk later, Lucy" she whispered. "Try to relax."

Meanwhile the ladies had returned to their idle chatter, and for Lucy the room seemed to slowly stop spinning. After what seemed like an eternity to Lucy the meal ended and mess emptied, until only Lucy and Kitty remained.

"Are you ok?" asked Kitty, closing the door to give them a little privacy.

"I'm fine, Kitty. I don't know why you would think otherwise."

Kitty sat beside her, placing her hand on Lucy's shoulder. "I saw the look on your face, Luce. I know what you were thinking."

Lucy's heart sank. "I don't know what I was thinking." She admitted. "I think my heart stopped beating, at least for a moment."

"You hadn't heard about this before?" Kitty asked. "Will hadn't told you about his letter?"

"I knew he had received one, but I didn't know what it contained. I assumed it was just idle chatter from his sister." Lucy sighed. "It does make sense, though" she admitted. "He has been avoiding me lately. At first I thought it was my imagination, but now I see that it was really true."

Suddenly it all came home to Lucy. Her feelings, her hopes, her desires. Everything had been a dream, and this mystery letter was the one thing required to shatter those dreams into a million pieces.

She looked at Kitty with resignation. "It doesn't make a difference, you know" she sighed. "Will is my friend, and if he is happy, then that is all that matters." She moved to stand, but Kitty stopped her.

"It does make a difference, Lucy," she snapped "a big difference. I know how you feel about him, how much you care for him, and yet you never tell him what's in your heart. Why?"

"What difference would it make" Lucy replied defensively. "Look at him, Kitty. He is a gentleman. He is the son of an Admiral, and as such he must make a good match. Look at me, Kitty." She paused to give her friend time to reflect on her imperfections. "I am nothing. I am the daughter of nobody, left on the street to become a worthless whore. My only saving grace is the education and opportunity the doctor has given me." She sighed again, staring into her empty cup. "I would never be good enough for him, Kitty, no matter how much I loved him."

In her heart, Lucy knew it was true. Who was she but a simple girl with no standing or connections? What hope could she have with a gentleman like William Mowett?

"No, Kitty." She finally concluded. "I would rather have his friendship and keep my feelings hidden in my heart, than to have a life without him."

Kitty sighed. This was a never ending uphill battle. She knew how much Lucy loved Will, but that no matter how much she tried, she couldn't convince her friend that if he loved her too, there would be no barrier to keep them apart. She couldn't convince Lucy of the feelings William obviously held for her; that he had so often cancelled plans to be with her, that his eyes never left her when she walked the deck, that he would move Heaven and Earth to make her happy. No, Lucy's mind was made up, and there was nothing that Kitty could do to change it.

Lucy stood up, and wrapped her red shawl around her shoulders. "I should be getting to bed now," She said. "There's nothing more to talk about. I was going to speak to you about something the doctor said to me, but I don't think it really matters now. What will happen will happen." She attempted a weak smile. "I'll see you in the morning".

Kitty looked at her friend silently. She stood and took Lucy in a warm embrace. "Don't let your heart break, Lucy" she whispered. "There is always hope, my friend."

Gently moving away, Lucy weakly smiled again and walked towards the door. She paused as she turned the handle, and glanced back at Kitty. "I lost hope long ago" she sighed.


	3. Chapter 3 Festivities

Chapter 3 – Festivities

The ship was quiet. Most of the crew had retired to their hammocks, with only a handful on watch above. The officers had assembled in their mess room after their meal with the Captain, to discuss the day's activities, and enjoy the remains of a rapidly emptying decanter of wine.

William Mowett sat in the far corner of the room, deep in thought. In front of him sat a letter, crinkled by its frequent readings. It had been over a week since he had received this communication from his father, and he still could not come to terms with its contents_. "I have arranged a most satisfactory union for you, my dear son,"_ it read, _"to the delightful Miss Elizabeth Pemberly."_ Will had read the words so many times, he knew them by heart. Again and again he scanned the page, until he read the one line that sent chills through him. _"It would give our family a great standing to be linked to the Pemberleys, and may well advance your passage to captaincy. I trust you will make the right decision in this matter."_

_Miserable old fool, _he thought. Will had never been close to his father, and although in his heart he loved the old man with a great affection, they never saw eye to eye. This was no exception. Admiral Mowett had made matches for his son before, and all of them had been rejected. Will's love for his family was strong, especially for his little sister Charlotte, but he was not willing to sacrifice his own happiness for the sake of the family name. Not without a fight.

Nevertheless, this time was different. This time the match was indeed an excellent one. Elizabeth Pemberley was one of the most eligible ladies in Portsmouth. The daughter of the Admiral Lord Pemberley, a union with her would not only give his family a better social standing, but may also advance his prospects in the Navy. He longed to be a Captain, and perhaps, with the young Miss Pemberley on his arm, this dream could finally become a reality.

But something in his mind said no; that same something that woke him in the middle of the night with thoughts of another; that something that said to him that love was more important that anything else in this world, and that he should not give up on his heart's desires. Time and time again his thoughts drifted to her. To Lucy. The woman who filled his dreams and gave him a reason to live. But what hope could there be with a woman as beautiful as Lucy Carrington?

She had been a member of the_ Surprise_ crew for so many years now, he could not remember life without her. Always beside the doctor, listening intently, working diligently, he was amazed by her intelligence, and entranced by her beauty. From the moment she stepped onto the ship she had struck a chord with the two young midshipmen who helped her awkwardly carry the doctor's cases of instruments onto the deck. The boys had introduced themselves as Mowett and Pullings, and from then the group had become the almost inseperable. Whenever things got tough, or they needed a friend, this gang of three could always call on each other for support, and as the two boys advanced in ranks and became men, Lucy too had grown with them to become more independent, more skilled in the arts of medicine, and more stunning with every day. William had always been closer to Lucy than Tom, especially later in their friendship, but why he did not know. Perhaps it was because he and Lucy seemed to see eye to eye on so many things. He relished her company, and enjoyed her conversation. She was everything a woman could be; beautiful, intelligent, independent. He couldn't remember the first time he realised he was in love with her. He only remembered that sunny day, seeing her emerge from below decks in her favourite dress, her red shawl wrapped around her delicate shoulders, and suddenly realizing that life would not be worth living if she was not by his side.

But his thoughts had stayed hidden within his heart. He had never told her of his affections. That would not do. Although he knew her history, and that she was not a gentleman's daughter, this meant nothing to him. He was not one to judge others based on their family or heritage. No, he saw in her a woman beyond the mere bounds of society's expectations, with an intelligence which enabled her knowledge and wisdom to develop to an incredible level, second only to the doctor to all on board. In the many years she had been part of the Surprise crew, Lucy had become indispensable to the doctor, and indeed to the crew themselves, who looked to her with respect and friendship, and to help them in their illnesses and wounds in a way which the doctor could not. Her gentle nature lent itself beautifully to medicine, giving her the perfect bedside manner.

Will reflected on all of this and smiled. Lucy was perfect. So charming, so witty, so beautiful. He saw in her a woman who deserved only the best, and he never believed that he could ever be good enough to win her heart. He was wealthy, to be sure, but that meant nothing to Lucy. She was born in poverty, and was quite willing to die in poverty, although with her own profits from Captain Aubrey's many successful missions this would surely never be the case. No, she had made it clear that her life would always be devoted to the world of medicine and science she had grown to love so much, and how on Earth could he ever hope to compete with that?

So he had remained silent. Painfully silent. Watching her every move, being there whenever she needed him, giving her anything he could give her without crossing the line he had drawn in his heart between friendship and intimate affection. _Better to support her, and be there for her. I could never hope to win her love, that would be asking too much,_ he though to himself with a sigh. _Perhaps I should just accept Miss Pemberley and be done with it; maybe then I could try to forget Lucy..._

His thoughts were disturbed by the sound of clinking glasses, as a very drunk Tom Pullings staggered to the seat beside him, carrying a half empty decanter of red wine.

"Fancy a drop of this, Will?" He slurred.

"I don't think so," replied Will, silently folding up his letter and depositing it into his jacket pocket.

Tom smiled a very crooked smile. "Still thinking about that letter, are you? Well, you know what I think." He took another gulp of wine from his rapidly emptying glass. "I think you've got one of the most beautiful women in the world sitting three rooms away, and you're a bloody fool if you let her go for the sake of a Pemmerly." Tom was so drunk, the words seemed to blend into one, and Pemberley definitely did not come out as it should have.

William smiled. Apart from Lucy, Tom was the best friend he had in the world. The two had been through many adventures together, and knew each other's minds so well they could anticipate each other's actions when it mattered. Tom was also the only person in the world who knew how Will felt about Lucy, and had been sworn to secrecy never to reveal his friends feelings to the lady; a promise he had kept for a very long time. Will trusted Tom with his life, but still could not believe his observation that "...the girl obviously has feelings for you". No, that could not be true. He would have seen if that were true, but Lucy had always made it clear that friendship was all she desired. Or so he thought.

"I haven't made up my mind about anything yet" Will told his inebriated friend. "I'm just considering my options".

"Well, if you ask me, it's all academic". Tom had begun to sway ever so slightly with the rocking action of the ship from the moment he sat down, and his swaying was now becoming more pronounced. "She's perfect for you. I don't know why you never tell her your love her. She's perfect for you, you're perfect for her. Simple!"

"We've been through this before, Tom. It's not worth going through again. Besides, you're enjoying your drink way too much."

"Yes, I am" he replied heartily, as he took another gulp of wine and poured the remains of the decanter into his glass. His swaying had become far more noticeable as his glass had gradually emptied, and not a healthy sway either, William noted.

"Well, you can sit here and be miserable, Mr Mowett. I am going back to join the party." Tom stood up on unsteady feet, and staggered back to where Mr Allen and Mr Howard sat at the far end of the officers mess, engaged in a very out of tune sing along.

Will smiled as he watched his friend attempt a safe passage back to the festivities. He reflected on Tom's words: "She's perfect for you, you're perfect for her. Simple!" he had stammered.

_If only it were that simple_, he thought.


	4. Chapter 4 Under attack

Chapter 4 – Under Attack.

The peace of early morning was shattered by the beating of the drum, signalling the crew to take their positions for battle. Lucy rubbed her eyes and jumped out of her hammock. She had barely slept all night for thinking, and the thumping sound of the snare drum gave her a migraine. Nevertheless, she threw on her clothes and bustled past rushing sailors, making her way to the sick bay. She listened to the mutterings of passers by as she went, trying to ascertain the reason for the summons to battle stations, but all she could make out was a whisper about a phantom ship.

The doctor was already waiting for her, tying his neckchief and laying out his tools for surgery. "Good morning, Lucy," he greeted her. "Did you sleep well?" It always amazed Lucy how calm Stephen could be during times like this.

"Yes thank you," she lied. "Do you know what's happening?"

"No," he replied absently, "but I do hope it's a false alarm. I am dying for some breakfast." He tested the edge of his gatling. Yes, sharp enough.

For a few minutes all was quiet. All Lucy could hear was the occasional shout from deck – she recognized Tom Pullings voice yelling orders – but that was all. The waiting made her uneasy. She rested against the bookshelf, closing her eyes to try to ease her migraine to a dull ache.

Suddenly she heard Captain Aubrey's voice shout "all hands down!", and a second later the ship was a war zone. Lucy involuntarily ducked with the sound of cannon fire, as 22 cannon balls shattered the hull of the Surprise with terrible accuracy.

At the end of the initial attack, she shakily stood up to find the doctor already at the operating table, rolling up his sleeves. "Not a false alarm after all" he said with surprising calm. "Get ready, Lucy. I think this is going to be a busy morning."

The rest of the attack seemed to blend into one great commotion for Lucy. She remembered little, except the doctor's absent orders as he worked: "Lucy, get my scissors"; "more bandages"; "more sand on the floor". He always seemed to remember everything. The only other event which stayed in her mind was the image of Tom Pullings being carried into the sick bay in the heat of the battle. She immediately tended to his wounds – they were not too serious – and in a short time he regained consciousness, although he was a little groggy. She ordered him to rest, and he knew better than to argue with her; Lucy could be very stubborn sometimes, particularly when her friends were in need of her attention.

Without warning, the Surprise's cannons stopped their counter attack, and all was quiet. "Why are we not firing?" asked Stephen to no-one in particular. To Lucy's dismay, Tom immediately stood up and left the sick bay, heading to the deck and Captain Aubrey's command. She put her irritation aside and continued to treat the wounded, paying special attention to young Midshipman Blakeney, who had been brought to the sick bay with a terrible splinter wound to his arm.

As the hours passed, the death toll became clear, and the wounded gradually seemed to settle to some peace. At length the captain arrived to check the butcher's bill, finding 9 dead, and 27 wounded. The captain himself was also wounded, but it was only minor, and he and the doctor withdrew for treatment and some quiet words about their current situation.

Slowly the evening went on, and the wounded stabilised. Some crew visited the sick bay to see friends and colleagues, bringing with them information about the battle above. As Lucy suspected, the _Surprise_ was beaten quite comprehensively by what she later learned to be a French frigate, called the _Acheron_. The _Surprise_ was no match for this bigger, more powerful ship, and she had paid the price dearly. The _Surprise_ had well and truly lost this encounter, but luckily some quick thinking from the Captain had pulled them out of trouble, just in the nick of time.

In between snippets of news from above, Lucy as always worked hard to make sure everybody was comfortable, and her tiredness was beginning to show. She stayed in the sick bay whilst the doctor departed for the Captain's cabin, presumably to discuss the battle and what the Surprise's next action would be. When he returned, he looked visibly troubled.

"What happened, Stephen?" she asked him quietly. "You seem uneasy."

"We were thoroughly beaten, Lucy." He replied. "The damage on deck is extensive, and the rudder is completely destroyed. We need repairs urgently."

"I expected as much," she whispered. "It was not hard to tell we were in trouble. So I suppose we will make basic repairs before we head home, at least to get us there in one piece?"

"We're not going home," he told her, the concern showing in his voice. "The Captain means to refit the ship at sea, and chase the French ship that attacked us around the peninsula if need be."

Lucy had been friends with the officers and crew long enough to understand the intricacies of sailing and ocean life, and knew all too well the implications what the doctor had said. The Captain had, it would seem, taken the attack personally, and the _Surprise_ was to chase this bigger, faster, more powerful ship to the ends of the earth. Now the crew was to suffer for Aubrey's pig headedness, and that was entirely unfair.

Silently Lucy checked herself. She had tried so hard to be understanding of the Captain, although she would readily admit that she did not like him. Not at all. She knew that he hated her presence on board, as he hated having the other women on board, but he had begrudgingly accepted her due to the doctor's great influence over him. The Captain had never been anything but painfully polite to her, the occasional "Hello" as far as he would lower himself to civility. She knew that he had openly questioned her ability to minister medicine to his crew; something she deeply resented. _Just because I'm a woman doesn't make me less competent_ she often thought to herself, but she kept her opinions well hidden. Captain Aubrey was not known for his ability to relate to the female crew. Indeed, he saw them as an unwanted distraction, not only to his crew and officers, but also to himself on occasion...

His officers. In the heat of the battle and the ensuing carnage, Lucy had totally forgotten about William. She knew he was on deck at the time, but as he had not been brought to the sick bay, she thought he was alright, and put her concern for him out of her mind. Nevertheless, she suddenly had a burning desire to see him, and make sure he was unhurt. It was just after 4 bells, and she knew it was his watch – perfect time for some fresh air above, she thought.

She looked around to find the doctor examining little Will Blakeney's arm. It did not look good. Lucy recognized the beginnings of gangrene, and knew that the boys arm would shortly need to be removed, but she kept her observations to herself.

Quietly approaching the doctor, she spoke to him softly to avoid attention. "I am tired, doctor. I think I may have a turn on the deck, if it is alright with you."

He looked up at her, his eyes showing his exhaustion. "Yes, that's fine" he replied. "After that you should get some sleep. I think we will be busy again tomorrow as we continue treatment of the wounded. I will need your help with this arm too, I think" he said quietly, referring to the greening skin on Blakeney's right forearm.

Lucy nodded silently and left the sick bay, bound for the deck. She paused at her hammock to collect her favourite shawl, then made her way foreward and mounted the stairs to the deck above.


	5. Chapter 5 Concerns

Chapter 5 – Concerns

As soon as Lucy reached the top of the fore stairway, the devastation was obvious. Masts had been lost, woodwork ripped away by cannon fire, blood stains splashed across the boards. The ship was a disaster, and looking at the damage it occurred to Lucy that they were all lucky to even be alive. Many members of the crew were still on deck, trying to ascertain the exact extent of the damage, and just how much work it would take to make it right again.

She stepped carefully through the mess, occasionally avoiding loose woodwork, passing the weary sailors who toiled around her. Silently she made her way to the Quarterdeck, feeling the cold emptiness of a night envelope her. She looked ahead to find Will, and saw him standing close to the helm. Even at this distance, she could see his exhaustion. It had been a very long day, and he had been in the thick of the battle, doing everything he could to keep the ship in one piece. As she approached, he turned towards the stern – he had not seen her. She paused for a moment at the bottom of the stairs, recalling the conversations of yesterday with Kitty and the doctor, and the fact that Will had been avoiding her. She suddenly felt a lot less certain about this visit. Perhaps he did not want to see her? Perhaps he was not in the mood to be social? Perhaps their friendship was over in light of this phantom letter? So many thoughts raced through her head, but she pushed them aside with the one thought that he may be injured, and need her assistance. She clung to that thought as she took a deep breath and mounted the stairs to the Quarterdeck.

"Mr Mowett, are you alright this evening?"

He turned to her, and she saw the lines on his face were deep from worry and exhaustion. Nevertheless, he immediately smiled upon seeing her, and his expression brightened noiceably.

"Miss Carrington, how lovely to see you on deck. I am fine, thank you. Are you alright, my dear?" His voice was light, but concern showed through his intonation.

"Me? Yes, I am alright. We have been busy below, so many wounded, you know. As always the doctor is keeping everything under control"

"With help from his lovely assistant, I'm sure" he replied cheerfully.

Lucy smiled in spite of herself. Will always had a way of cheering her up, even when things seemed too hard to bear. For a moment she forgot her concerns, and his letter, and her feelings for him, and simply enjoyed the company of her best friend.

They chatted a little longer, ever so respectably. Whenever they were in the company of the crew, they referred to each other as Mr Mowett and Miss Carrington, to maintain the proper appearance of rank and respectability, although the privilege of walking the Quarterdeck with the officers was reserved for Lucy and Lucy only, and only when the Captain was not on watch.

As their conversation continued, they strolled leisurely to the stern of the _Surprise_, and out of hearing range of the coxswain and sergeant on duty. Once far enough away, their speech became much more relaxed.

"Tell me, Will" Lucy started, her concern evident. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, Luce, I am fine" he replied, suddenly allowing the exhaustion to show in his voice. "A few scratches, but nothing that won't heal."

"What happened?" she asked him. "The deck looks like a war zone."

"We were beaten, simple as that. It was a heavy French frigate, 18 pound guns, out of our class. It was an unfair match, but what could we do?" He looked out into the dark fog, surrounding the ship like a velvet cloak. "We did all we could, Lucy, and at least we are alive." He sighed.

She put her hand on his arm. At first it seemed like the most natural thing in the world to do, and she was quite unprepared for the rush of nervousness that accompanied it. All of a sudden she felt unsure, uneasy. He had been avoiding her, she seemed certain of that, but now they were together, there was a feeling inside her that told her he needed her there, and that she should hold him, or at least be as close to him as she could.

For his part, William Mowett had been a total mix of emotions since Lucy had appeared on deck. He had silently hoped she would emerge from sickbay at some point, but when he saw her red shawl at the top of the stairway, his nerves had taken over, and he felt as though he might burst if she approached him. He turned towards the stern as she mounted the quarterdeck stairs, not because he had not seen her, but because he needed to take a deep breath and relax, to stop himself from taking her into his arms then and there. Now, when she put her hand on his arm, he felt a rush through him, and it took all his self control to stop himself from holding her.

"It's ok, Will," she whispered to him, smiling. "Everybody did their best, and that's all you can expect from any of us."

She kept her hand on his arm as she looked out beyond the stern into the dark shadows behind them. It felt so right, being with him, she almost let down her guard. "I'm glad you are ok, although I was a little hesitant about coming up here, you know," she said, taking a breath to stay calm. "It seemed like you had been avoiding me lately." It was now or never, Lucy thought, and she needed to know.

It had not been intentional, but Will saw that his actions could easily have been interpreted as avoidance, although this was the first time he had really thought about it. He could never consciously avoid her – he enjoyed her company too much – but with the letter and the choices he was being forced to make, he knew that seeing her would make it harder for him to let go of his feelings for her, if the need arose.

He paused for a moment to gather his thoughts. "No, I haven't been avoiding you," he replied. "I have just been preoccupied lately. I have had a few things that I really need to think about."

This is it, she thought. Maggie was right; there was something in the letter. Perhaps if she pushed him a little....

"What decisions, Will? Is there anything I can do?"

He looked into her dark eyes, shining in the soft lamplight. "No, it's something I need to figure out for myself this time. I ask for your advice so many times, and I value it greatly, but you can't help me with this one, I'm afraid."

She knew him better than to push too hard. It was no use. She dropped her hand from his forearm. "It's ok. You know if you need me, I am always here." She said quietly, smiling as she pulled her shawl around her shoulders.

_Her smile could light up the darkest night_, William thought to himself. He smiled back at her warmly. "You are too good to me, Lucy."

"Not at all," she replied with a silvery laugh. "You are my friend, and you should know by now that there is nothing I wouldn't do...."

"Excuse me, Sir, but the Captain has sent for you to join him in the Great Cabin." The sergeant had approached so quietly, neither of them even noticed him.

Will sighed. "Of course," he answered in his most authoritative voice. It always amazed Lucy how his intonation could be so firm when he was giving orders to the crew, compared to the softness his voice possessed when he was in her company.

"I'm afraid I must leave you, Miss Carrington. I trust you will sleep well." He said pleasantly.

"Thank you, Mr Mowett. Goodnight". With that they both went their separate ways; Will to the Great Cabin, Lucy to her own bed, and another night of sleeplessness. As always, her conversations with Will left her heart thumping in her chest, and her breath a little quicker than usual. This time, however, it was a feeling tainted with uncertainty. He had not told her about the letter, nor had he asked for her help. She was at a loss as to where this feeling would take her, but as always she conceded that there was little she could do.

_What will happen will happen_ she said to herself, as she silently entered the women's cabin, closing the door behind her.


	6. Chapter 6 Repairs

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: I love Blakeney. I think he is such a cute little boy. I figured it would be right that Blakeney and Lucy become friends, and I really enjoyed writing this chapter. I think it worked quite well, and it tells us a bit about both characters. Enjoy!_

Chapter 6 – Repairs

The next morning saw the repair of the ship begin in earnest. All hands were called to stations, mending, building, replacing, tidying. The deck was abuzz with the sounds of hammering, sawing, and the odd expletive when a hammer missed its intentional mark. In the midst of all this activity roamed the officers and midshipmen, taking notes from the Captain as to how to best manage repairs, watching the work of their crew with an eagle eye.

During all this activity, Lucy spent her time below decks, assisting with the last of the wounded from the initial battle. One of those still on the wounded list was little William Blakeney. His gangrene had advanced over the days that followed the battle, and there was no choice left but to remove his infected arm. The boy had been brave; the pain he suffered was horrendous, but he did not cry out. By the end of the procedure he was still reasonably calm, although his thoughts would no doubt have betrayed his true feelings during the operation.

On this particular day, Lucy was cleaning and replacing the doctor's instruments, carefully laying them out in their respective drawers. Blakeney was asleep in the hammock behind her, and she took great care not to wake him. However, at length, he opened his eyes and found that, for the first time, he was feeling decidedly peckish.

"Excuse me, Miss Carrington". Lucy heard a little voice from behind her, and turned to find Mr Blakeney wide awake, and with more colour in his face than he had shown in many days. "If it is not too much of an imposition, could I possibly have something to eat?"

Lucy smiled. "Of course you can. I have some bread and cheese here, would you like that?"

"Yes, thank you." He replied cheerfully.

Lucy carried the platter to Blakeney, cutting some slices of cheese to make it easier for him to eat. Now, without his right arm, things would be hard for the boy, and Lucy did all she could to make the transition to his new way of life as painless as possible. Blakeney was only young – barely 13 – but she had immediately seen in him a strong will and a beautiful personality. This was his first voyage at sea, and it pained Lucy to think that the boy had been so horribly wounded on his first assignment. Still, she was surprised at his cheerfulness in spite of his situation, and encouraged by the smile that seemed to never leave his tiny face.

As Lucy sliced the meal into smaller portions, he watched on gratefully, knowing that she understood the difficulties he would now face with one arm gone. She handed him the plate, and he smiled up at her.

"Thank you, Miss Carrington. That was very kind of you."

"Please, Mr Blakeney, call me Lucy. We have become too familiar with each other for this 'Miss Carrington' business to continue."

He smiled again. "Thank you, Miss Lucy. In that case, you can call me Will."

"No, I'm afraid that won't do" Lucy frowned. "I am good friends with Mr Mowett, and I call him Will. I wouldn't want to confuse you now, would I?"

She thought for a moment. "No, I shall call you Billy. My little Billy. How does that sound?" she laughed, stroking his soft blonde hair. He may be a midshipman, but to Lucy he was still only a child.

"That's very nice, Miss Lucy. My mother calls me Billy, you know. Thank you ever so." With that, he tucked into his meal heartily, and Lucy returned to her instruments.

After a time, little Billy as she had decided to call him, finished his meal and decided it was a good time to ask the question he had been dying to ask since he boarded. With no-one but Miss Lucy present, he thought it was the perfect opportunity.

"Miss Lucy, why did you decide to become a doctor?" he asked sheepishly.

Lucy turned from her chores and looked at his innocent face. "Well, it wasn't really a choice I made, it was an opportunity I was given."

Seeing Billy's curiosity, she put down the gatling she was polishing and pulled up a chair next to his hammock.

"You see, when I was about your age, the doctor found me in dire straits, and helped me when I needed help. He took me in, and taught me many things, like how to read and write. He was like a father to me. I spent a lot of time with him, and gradually I began to show an interest in medicine and the natural world."

Lucy paused for a moment to gather her thoughts. A sudden inspiration took her, and she walked across to the doctor's bookshelf, full of dusty volumes of everything from science to poetry. She picked out one particular book and moved back to her seat next to Billy's hammock.

"When I was a little older than you I decided that medicine and science were my passions, and I think it really first occurred to me when the doctor gave me this book."

She handed him the dusty volume, its leather cover starting to fray at the edges. Billy opened it curiously. _Taylor's Natural History of the World_ was its title, and at once it sparked the boy's interest.

"It is a wonderful book," she continued, "and it showed me just how interesting the natural world really is. It has some wonderful illustrations – it helped me to teach myself how to draw plants and animals."

Billy had already begun to thumb through the pages, his curiosity evident. Lucy smiled happily. Perhaps in Billy was a young student whom she could help the way the doctor had helped her.

"Would you like to read it?" she asked him. "I am sure the doctor wouldn't mind."

"Yes, I most certainly would, Miss Lucy" was the happy reply. "Thank you so much."

With that he began with page one, and concentrated intently on the words and images before him. Lucy stood quietly and moved to take the chair away from the hammock side, to allow him to read in peace. As she did, he stopped and looked up at her.

"None of the officers are interested in this kind of thing, are they Miss Lucy?" he asked her.

Curious. This was not a question Lucy was expecting. "Not to my knowledge, no," she answered. "Why do you ask?"

"It's just that I want to be an officer one day, and I don't know if I should waste my time on this kind of thing, that's all." He paused. "I know Mr Mowett writes poetry, but that's different. His poems are all about ships and battles and the like, nothing like this."

Lucy was aware of Will's love for poetry, and she adored him for it, but she kept her opinion to herself. "Yes, Mr Mowett does write poetry, and that's his interest outside of being an officer. Why can't your interest be the natural world instead?" she asked him.

"I suppose so" Billy conceded. He suddenly smiled. "It is all very interesting, this science business, don't you think?"

"Yes, it is" Lucy agreed. She reflected for a moment. "Don't worry yourself about what other people do, Billy," she told him. "Be yourself. That's all you can be. So Mr Mowett writes poetry. You don't have to copy him to be an officer, you know. After all, all Mr Mowett talks about is ships and battles and the like."

"And you, Miss Lucy" said Billy, intently studying an illustration of a beetle. "He talks about you all the time, too."

Lucy froze. _He talks about me_ she thought? This was something she had not heard before. Perhaps Billy's innocence and good nature had not lent themselves to concealment just yet, and he was quite willing to share his observations of various members of the crew, including her Will Mowett.

She pretended not to be too interested, continuing to polish her instruments, but decided to push him a little further. "Mr Mowett talks about me, does he?" she said casually. "And what does he say?"

Billy looked up from his book. Something told him from her voice that this was not the best situation for him to be in, and he immediately put up his guard.

"Oh, nothing much, Miss Lucy." He stammered. "Just that you are friends, and that you are a very good doctor, that sort of thing." He held his breath as he waited for her to reply.

Lucy immediately saw his discomfort, and dropped the subject. "Yes, we are friends" she replied simply. "I have known Mr Mowett and Mr Pullings since we were only a little older than you, you know. They started out as midshipman, just like you, and look at them now."

Billy's discomfort eased with her response. "Yes, perhaps I can be an officer like them one day, too, Miss Lucy?"

"Yes, indeed you can." She answered, smiling. "Now concentrate. It's a long book, and you have barely finished two pages!"


	7. Chapter 7 Observations

Chapter 7 – Observations

The night was calm and clear, and the crew had assembled on the deck for a night of fun and festivities. It was a celebration of all of their successes, and the return of the ship to her former glory. Two crewmen presented their fiddle and flute respectively, and the sounds of jigs and folk tunes soon filled the still night air.

Lucy was on deck, too, enjoying the festivities along with the other ladies. As members of the crew they were always welcome to celebrate with the boys, although the vast majority of the crew was very respectful to Miss Carrington, more so than to the other ladies, and they kept their distance from her. Not only was she the doctor's assistant, but she was also best friends with the Lieutenants, and they knew that one wrong word to her could have them ordered to scrub the decks for a week.

The main company for Lucy came in the form of Billy Blakeney, her new found friend, who was happily tapping away to the music with his foot, a huge smile on his small face. She stood beside him, the only woman allowed on the Quarterdeck, finding herself also tapping to the beat. Occasionally she and Blakeney spoke about how one of the crew was a funny dancer, or how the music was so lively it made them almost want to get up and dance themselves. At length she put her hand on his shoulder, feeling very protective of this little boy whom she had grown so very close to.

Meanwhile the officers had enjoyed their evening meal in the Captain's Cabin (including the sharing of a few excellent bottles of wine), and had now made their way to the deck to join in the festivities above. They emerged from below in silence, watching the dancing and singing from the relative seclusion of the helm.

Upon climbing the stairs to the upper deck, William Mowett stood at a short distance from the Captain and the other officers. He looked around for Lucy, seeing her also on the Quarterdeck, her hand on Blakeney's tiny shoulder. They were obviously enjoying the party, and he desired nothing more than to enjoy it with them. He quietly left the officers party and approached her, ever conscious of his appearance when in her presence. It was true, he had consumed his fair share of wine that evening, but he felt that he was in a sober enough state to converse with Lucy as a civilized gentleman. Or so he believed.

"Good evening, Miss Carrington," he began, surprised at the slurring in his voice. "How are you this evening? And a good evening to you too, Mr Blakeney" he added, trying hard not to sound as drunk as he clearly was.

Lucy smiled. She saw him appear on to the deck with the others, and saw his flushed face, knowing full well that the free flowing wine from dinner would undoubtedly have an effect on him. Will was never a big drinker, nothing like Pullings, (who could down a bottle of red wine in less than 10 minutes), but he didn't mind the odd drop. She knew, however, that he made certain never to be too tipsy in her presence, as he was well aware of her negative opinion on the effects of excessive alcohol.

"Good evening to you, Mr Mowett," Lucy replied cheerfully. "We are very well thank you, aren't we, Billy" she smiled, tapping Billy's shoulder affectionately.

"Why, yes Miss Lucy" he replied happily. "It's a great party, sir."

"Indeed. Indeed it is" said William, swaying happily to the tune from the flute player aft. At one point, his swaying seemed to be a little too unhealthy, and Lucy reached out to catch him. He did not fall, but leant on her arms for support, coughing uncomfortably.

"I am sorry, Miss Carrington. Terribly sorry." He said, clearly embarrassed that he had made this display in front of Blakeney.

Lucy laughed. "It's quite alright, Will" she giggled, forgetting her necessity for propriety in front of the young midshipman. "We know each other too well for that."

Will suddenly forgot the ship, the crew, Blakeney, everything around him, and enjoyed the feeling of being in Lucy's arms. Perhaps it was the wine, he thought, but he still felt that the warm rush that went through him when she held him was more than just the effects of too many festive glasses. He stayed there, holding onto her in the least noticeable way possible, making out that he was still unsteady. She, too, did not let go, believing that he needed the help to stand as a proper gentleman should.

What Will did not know was, at that moment, the Captain had glanced his way, noticing the arms of the surgeon's mate gently supporting his second officer. What was this, he thought? He did not even notice Mowett leave the company of the officers, and to see him now, so close to this woman, and on deck, in clear view of the men, made him suddenly very angry. Not only that, but who was Lucy to presume that she, a lowly surgeons mate, had the right to walk the Quarterdeck with the gentlemen? Who the hell did she think she was?

"That is why I don't like women on my ships" he snapped at Stephen, motioning towards where Mowett and Carrington were standing, quietly laughing together. "She should be put in her place" he said angrily, moving to approach them.

Stephen, however, put out a hand to stop him. "Don't Jack, it's alright. I will speak to her later. Leave them for now," he said quietly.

Jack looked at the doctor curiously. "What's going on, Stephen?" he asked. "Is there something going on between my Second Lieutenant and the Surgeons Mate that I should know about?"

Stephen paused. "No, I don't believe there is" he conceded softly, "but I don't think it's not from a lack of feeling on either side." He looked towards his young assistant and her tipsy companion. "They are very close friends, you know. I am quite certain that Lucy harbours stronger feelings for him, but to my knowledge they have not been reciprocated as yet."

Stephen looked at them intently. "Although," he smiled, "knowing the way Mr Mowett pays special attention to her, I am sure that it is only a matter of time before they are."

The thought of this made the doctor happy. Yes, quite happy indeed. Lucy had been his constant companion for so long now, she was almost like a sister, or a daughter to him, and he had felt honoured to watch her grow into the woman she had now become. However, it pained him to think that she, this most radiant of women, had never been given the opportunity to find love and truly be a woman in the eyes of a beau. Stephen saw in Will the opportunity for his young protégé to finally find the affection he knew she craved, and nothing would have made him more pleased than to see her happily wrapped in the arms of the Second Officer.

Jack, however, saw things very differently. This was not acceptable. He saw Lucy as a troublemaker, an unwanted distraction, and this news of her possibly liaison with Mowett simply confirmed his opinions. _So, she has designs on one of my young lieutenants, does she?_ _Well, Mowett had better make sure it didn't distract him from his duties_, Jack thought_. I will not have one of my officers the laughing stock of the ship, caught in the throes of passion with a ships girl in the stores in the middle of the night._ No, Jack had done everything he could to advance Pullings and Mowett in their ranks, and he did not expect to be repaid in this way. _His_ officers were better than that, and Mowett would do well to remember it.

The Captain's anger was pacified by the ships company beginning a sing along, and he stood for a moment, enjoying the sounds of raised happy voices, before deciding that the party had gone on long enough.

"Gentlemen," he said to Stephen and his officers, casting a sidelong glance at Will and Lucy. "I believe it is time for us to depart."

Mowett heard his command, and his heart sank. All through the festivities, Lucy had held him close, believing he was too unsteady to stand on his own. It was a rouse, but a clever one, as it gave him the opportunity to be close to her. It felt good. Very good, and he did not want to leave her this way. Still, he knew that orders were orders, and that he must depart. Reluctantly, he let go of her arm.

"It seems I must leave you both" he said to Lucy and Billy brightly. "Do enjoy the party" he added, turning to leave.

Lucy smiled after him. It was the closest they had been in quite a time, and she relished feeling his warmth next to her skin. Reluctantly she watched him make his way below.

"Good night, Mr Mowett" she called to him.

Lucy turned back to Billy, He had witnessed the entire scene between Lucy and Will, and was smiling furiously. He may have been young, but he was very observant, and he was certainly not a fool.

"What are you smiling about?" Lucy asked him.

"Oh, nothing, Miss Lucy. Nothing at all," he grinned.


	8. Chapter 8 Admissions

Chapter 8 – Admissions.

"Mr Hollar, please don't shout."

Will's head felt like a tonne of bricks. He had awoken early to take the morning watch, and it had suddenly dawned on him exactly how much wine he had consumed the night before. He regretted it, oh God did he regret it, but there was nothing for it now. But if he must leave the comfortable darkness of his cabin, the least the crew could go about their business a little more quietly, to try and ease the pain.

"Yes, sir. Sorry, sir" said Mr Hollar at slightly less volume than his usual roar.

The sea was quite still, and the ocean was empty from horizon to horizon. Will paced the Quarterdeck, feeling his head pound at the same beat as his heart, swearing an oath never to drink wine again.

"Are you feeling a little delicate this morning, Will?"

It was Lucy, standing a little way from the coxswain, smiling broadly. "I heard what you said to Mr Hollar. Headache, have we?" She was obviously finding the situation amusing, and would milk it for all it was worth.

"Hmm. Some friend you are" he groaned, his top hat slipping slightly as he turned to face her. "I feel like I have been hit by a hundred cannon balls. It's not pleasant, Luce."

"You should have thought of that before you drank the whole bottle then, shouldn't you?" she laughed.

_The whole bottle? Dear God, it didn't seem like that much last night_, he thought. _Come to think of it, what did happen last night..._

"Still," she continued, "you seemed to enjoy yourself, although you were a little unsteady on your feet. Lucky I was there to give you assistance," she grinned.

Oh, no, what had he done? He closed his eyes to recall, but his memory failed him.

"It's alright, Will," she smiled, sensing his inability to remember the evening's events. "You were perfectly respectable, honestly. You just needed a helping hand to stay upright. Nothing that couldn't be rectified by a little assistance from a friend."

His attempt to recollect the events of the previous evening were interrupted by a call from the crows nest. "Ship ahoy" was the cry. "Looks like a frigate."

Will immediately forgot his headache and took up his spyglass. He looked out towards the aft horizon to see the shape of a ship approaching, with a flag that, even at this distance, looked suspiciously like a French flag.

"Beat to quarters" he yelled at the top of his voice. At once the drums began, and the crew scurried across the decks in preparation of an ensuing battle. He turned to Lucy, touching her arm gently.

"You had better go below, Lucy. If this turns into another battle, I don't want you anywhere near the upper decks."

"I understand. The doctor will be no doubt be needing me anyway." She turned to leave the quarterdeck, but stopped and turned back, concern in her eyes.

"Will," she said softly, "be careful."

"Always" he replied with a smile, turning away abruptly to give orders to the sergeant.

Lucy descended the stairs to the lower decks, passing Tom Pullings as she went. He, too, was in no state to be fighting a battle – he had had even more to drink the night before than Will had – but he was still moving quickly and intently without the hint of his delicate condition in sight. Lucy smiled at him as she passed, a smile which he returned, and they both continued on their way.

When she reached the sick bay, the doctor was preparing for the worst. "Here we go again" he said, laying out retractors and other instruments ready for another bloodbath.

Orders were shouted above, and the ship's pace quickened. Minutes stretched on and on, seeming like hours. Nothing happened, and the doctor and Lucy grew restless.

"Looks like we are trying to outrun them," Lucy said to him. "I don't think there will be a battle today, Stephen."

"I think you're right," he agreed. "I believe I will go up on deck and speak to the Captain, find out what is going on."

Stephen stood up from his chair and moved towards the door. But as he reached it, he paused, and instead of leaving the room, he closed the door to give them some privacy.

"Before I do, though, I mean to talk with you, Lucy, about something that concerns me."

Lucy's surprise showed as she looked up at her teacher. What was this? Had she done something wrong? Was he unhappy with her work? Lucy held her breath as Stephen returned to his seat and moved it closer to her, his expression serious.

"Lucy, you know I care very much about you, like my own sister, and I want you to be happy, yes?"

"Of course, Stephen, she replied. "You are the closest thing I have to family." This was not like him, not at all.

"Then you know that I would never lie to you. I must ask you, although I know it is something that is not completely my business, as I feel that it is important that I be clear about your situation. I have touched on it before, but you did not answer me, hence my question now."

Now Lucy was very concerned. He had never spoken to her like this before, not in all the years they had been together. Although her respect for him was like that of a daughter to her father, they had always had an invisible barrier between them, the barrier of teacher and student, and her nervousness at his intent had now reached panic point.

"Lucy," he asked directly, "is there some romantic involvement between yourself and Mr Mowett?"

Lucy nearly stopped breathing. All of a sudden she remembered his comment _"..all of the officers, or just the one"_ from weeks before, and she shuddered. She had forgotten it, believing it was not important, and that since the doctor had not mentioned it again, he must not be aware of her feelings for Will. Clearly now that was not the case.

"I don't mean to pry," he continued, "but I must know the truth if I am to act accordingly, particularly with the Captain."

Stephen was never one to delve into emotions, and Lucy knew how hard it was for him to approach this subject with her. She looked at him fondly. He was like the big brother she never had, and she knew that she owed it to him to be honest in this matter.

"No, Stephen," she began, "there is no affair between myself and Mr Mowett. There never has been. We are close friends, and that is all."

He looked at her intently. "But that is not all that you want, is it?" he asked her gently.

Lucy paused for a moment. "No," she conceded, "It's not. You are right, Stephen; I would like to be closer to him, but that is not going to happen. I don't think I would ever be good enough for him. You of all people know where I have come from, what my past is. I am no lady, and he deserves a lady. It's as simple as that."

It ripped her heart to say it, but as always, Lucy believed the words to be true. She sighed. She had not thought about this in a while, being so preoccupied with the ship and the mission since the initial battle, but now that she reflected on her feelings, it all came flooding back, bringing home the truth that her dreams were all just an unfulfilled fantasy that would never be.

"Does Mr Mowett know how you feel about him?" he asked her.

"No" she replied, "he doesn't." She paused and looked up at the doctor. The tears had begun to well in her eyes, although at first she could not determine why, as it was never like Lucy to cry. "And that is how it will remain," She continued. "My feelings are my feelings, and they will stay within this room, Stephen. Please don't speak a word of this to anyone. He is my friend, and I am happy just to have him near me."

Stephen saw her sadness, and put his hand awkwardly on her knee. Sympathy was never one of his strong points. He knew that to tell her of his observations was useless; he had overheard Lucy's past discussions with Kitty, and knew that even Kitty had seen Will's affections for her, but that Lucy had denied it. Stephen, too, was well aware of Mr Mowett's affections for his surgeons mate, but he kept his knowledge to himself.

"Don't be sad, my dear Lucy" he said quietly. "Take heart. Sometimes life has a funny way of making things work out, just when you least expect it."

His response was surprisingly tender, and Lucy felt closer to Stephen than she had ever been. Suddenly she felt as though she could keep it inside no longer, and she collapsed in his arms, sobbing softly. This was so unlike her, but at this moment she needed to have someone close to her who understood, and she knew that nobody on the ship really understood her better than Stephen Maturin. At this moment, she knew she had to let it all go.

Stephen held her shaking body for a few minutes as she gradually became more calm. Although he was pained to see her so unhappy, a small part of him was quite pleased to see the feminine side of his dear protégé finally revealed. She was a woman, indeed she was, and she needed to express her affections somehow, lest they be bottled up inside forever. Now, the invisible barrier of teacher and student was finally broken between them. Now, they were truly like brother and sister, and he could be there for her as a brother should be.

He pulled away from her and smiled, a tender, loving smile. "My dear little sister" he said to her softly. "Don't cry, all will be well, you'll see."

Lucy dried her eyes and smiled back at him. "You are right," she replied. "I have my medicine, and my love of the natural world, and that is what keeps me going."

"That is a good love to have," he said, brushing her dark hair away from her face tenderly, "but don't let it be all that fills your heart. You have such a capacity to love, Lucy. Never forget that."

With that, he stood up, smiled warmly at her, then turned and left the sick bay, without another word. He had left Lucy to contemplate the feelings that she had shown him, and what could possibly be in store for her.

_Things work out in the end,_ she thought. _Perhaps for some, but not for me...._


	9. Chapter 9 The Storm

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is one of my favourite dramatic scenes. I like using "The Storm" as the title as it kind of has a double meaning. We learn that William Mowett can have a very short fuse when he is pushed too hard, and that Lucy really can't hold her liquor..._

Chapter 9 – The Storm

The following days were a blur to Lucy. All she remembered was the terrible howl of the wind that one fateful day, and the sudden snap of the mizzen mast breaking in the storm, taking Will Warley to a watery grave.

The ship they had sighed days before was indeed the _Acheron_, and through skill and clever thinking the Captain had not only outrun them, but come up behind them in preparation for a much more even contest. But the chase had taken them around Cape Horn and through the roughest seas in the world, and the storm they had encountered was horrendous. Even Lucy, with all her years at sea behind her, found herself afraid in the face of its ferocity. It had taken Will Warley, and had almost taken the ship, but thankfully the wreckage of the mizzen had been cut free, saving the ship, but sending poor Warley to his death.

Although the storm had eased slightly, it was still roaring outside, as Lucy curled up in the corner of the women's mess room with a glass of rum, the near empty bottle beside her. She rarely drank at all, but now all she wanted to do was drown her sorrows. Lucy knew Warley well; she had met his wife Sarah, a lovely blonde from the colonies, and had frequently enjoyed their company when the Surprise was in port. Now, poor Sarah would be alone, and Lucy had lost another friend, not to the storm, not to war, but to the pride of a pig headed captain.

For Lucy, this was Aubrey's fault. It was his fault that they were here. His fault that Billy had lost his arm. His fault that her two best friends had not been made captains. She even entertained the idea that it was his fault that Will had not returned the affection she craved. Everything was Jack Aubrey's fault, that pathetic bastard, chasing this bloody ship to the ends of the earth. And for what? For his pride? Because he had to win? What kind of a reason was that?

As she took another swig of rum, her angry thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Lucy, are you ok?"

Will broke all tradition and entered the women's mess room, empty but for Lucy in a far corner. He pulled up a chair and sat beside her, concern showing in his face.

"You haven't been on deck, or even out of this room, in quite a while. I was starting to worry about you." He said, noticing the near empty bottle of rum next to her. This was not like Lucy. She rarely drank wine, let alone rum, and never this much.

Lucy stared into her cup. "I'm fine, Will. Just peachy," she said sarcastically. "Why wouldn't I be fine? We're at the bottom of the world, stuck in this wooden prison, with the storm outside that's turning into a total nightmare, and one of my friends has just been killed. Why wouldn't I be alright?" She did not look at him throughout her answer, instead refilling her glass with the last drops from the rum bottle.

He looked at her steadily. "What happened to Will Warley was an accident, Lucy. He was a casualty of war."

"Rubbish," she snapped back. "He was a casualty of Jack Aubrey's stubbornness."

Will sighed. She was so unhappy, and now she was drunk. He knew that there would be no reasoning with her, and yet her comment about the Captain stuck in his craw. He knew of Lucy's dislike for Aubrey, and had always accepted it, although he never agreed with it. Will never saw the side of Jack Aubrey that Lucy saw, and could never really understand her hatred of him. Aubrey had done much for Will and Tom; they owed him a great deal, and Will had always hoped that somehow Lucy would understand that. Now he could see that she still hated Aubrey, perhaps even more than before, and that she truly believed that Warley's life was lost because of Jack's inability to give in to an enemy. Will knew she was drunk, but he also believed that her reasoning was false, and he felt he must say something.

"You really shouldn't speak about the Captain like that, Lucy," Will said carefully. "He may be strong willed, but he is still the Captain, and he has saved us from some seemingly impossible situations in the past."

Lucy stopped drinking and looked at Will with glazed eyes. "Saved us," she snapped. "Saved us from what? From situations that he had put us into, that's what. He sends us into Hell, and expects us to be grateful when he rescues us from its clutches. What kind of captaincy is that?"

She stood up and stumbled to the table, looking for a second bottle of rum. She lost her footing and fell, but Will caught her before she hit the floor.

"I think you've had enough, Lucy" he said firmly, taking the glass out of her hand. "Why don't you go to bed?"

Suddenly Lucy was angry. Very angry. How dare he presume to tell her what to do? She was an independent woman, and didn't need Will to order her around. All of a sudden she was angry with him for giving her orders, angry for not understanding, angry for not loving her the way she loved him. She was in so much pain inside, at odds with the whole world, and looked for any way to express it.

"Don't you tell me what to do, William Mowett," she yelled at him, pulling herself free from his supporting hands. "You're not my father. I have no father. I have no family. There's nothing I have, except myself. _I_ tell me what to do, you hear?" With that she reached across the table for her empty glass and the unopened bottle of rum lying not far away.

The _Surprise_ was not a large ship, and the crew had all been forced below due to the storm. Will had no doubt that Lucy's voice had drifted throughout the neighbouring cabins, and that the crew were aware of her insolence to him, to a ranking officer. Suddenly he found himself in turn annoyed with Lucy for speaking to him in this way. They may be friends, but he was an officer in the King's Navy, and as such she, as crew, must show him respect or suffer the consequences. He knew that if her comments were heard it could undermine his authority, and that could be a disaster for him, and perhaps even for Lucy herself. She had put him in an untenable situation, and that in itself made his anger rise even more. He knew this situation must be dealt with, and quickly.

"No, Lucy, you've had enough" he said firmly, taking hold of her as she reached across the table.

Lucy's emotions had reached fever point. She turned on him, hitting his chest with her fist as he tried to hold her still.

"Leave me alone" she screamed angrily. "You don't care about me, I know you don't care. Get out, you bastard. Get out!" She was crying and screaming at the same time, hitting him as hard as she could.

Will took hold of her upper arms to stop her blows, and he gripped her a little more firmly than he meant to, but his own feelings were becoming harder to conceal. He needed to stop her, to calm her down, but hearing her scream in this way only served to push his own anger to its peak. He felt as though he would hit her if she did not stop her ranting, and without thinking he raised his hand in a fit of rage, ready to strike.

At that moment, the commotion brought Kitty and Maggie to the mess room. They removed Lucy from Will's grip just before his hand fell, speaking softly to her to try and calm her down. They carried her to a chair in the corner, where she stopped struggling and dissolved into a mass of tears.

Will stood motionless, trapped in a daze, watching the two women console Lucy in the corner. He was a mass of emotions; anger, sympathy, humiliation, sadness. He didn't know which way to turn. All of a sudden the woman he loved had turned on him with a ferocity he had never seen, and for his part he was so angry with her that he could easily have lashed out and struck her.

Kitty looked up at him, holding Lucy as she sobbed uncontrollably on her shoulder. "I think it would be best if you left, Mr Mowett." Kitty said calmly.

Her voice stirred Will out of his trance, and he slowly turned to leave. Some members of the crew had also heard the commotion, and now stood at the door, looking at Will and Lucy with curiosity, but as Will turned to face them, they moved away, not wanting to meet his angry gaze.

As he left he turned back to look at Lucy, seeing the women comforting her, holding her delicate, shaking body. He knew that what had just happened had ramifications not just for his himself and for Lucy as shipmates, but also for their relationship as friends. Now, there would be no hope for anything more than a simple friendship between them.

Now, it seemed, even their friendship was lost forever.


	10. Chapter 10 Wounds

Chapter 10 – Wounds

Lucy's upper arms ached almost as much as her head. The bruises had started to appear earlier in the evening, and as her hangover had gradually taken hold, so had the pain in her arms and shoulders until the dark finger marks had begun to show. The doctor had packed them with ice, but the pain was still foremost in Lucy's mind, along with the thumping in her head which felt like a dozen cannons being fired in rapid succession.

Stephen was sitting in the corner of the sick bay, silently writing in his journal. He looked over as Lucy stirred from her brief slumber, groaning from the pain. He stood up and brought his chair to her side, reapplying the ice to her arms and head.

"It's ok, Lucy. It will soon pass" he said quietly.

Lucy opened her eyes to see the doctor sitting beside her, gently tending her wounds. She tried to rise out of bed, instead falling back onto the pillow from exhaustion. She had never felt this bad. Never. Not only that, but she didn't have a clear idea why she was in so much pain.

"What happened, doctor? Was I attacked?" she asked him.

"No," he replied, "it was you who did the attacking, Lucy. Now rest. You need your strength."

Lucy didn't heed his words, instead attempting again to sit upright in her cot. This time she managed to push herself up until she was leaning against the backboard awkwardly. She looked at the doctor intently through her glazed eyes.

"Stephen, what happened. Tell me, please."

The doctor sighed, leaving his chair and sitting down on the bed next to her. "You were drunk, Lucy. Terribly drunk. You attacked him, and he tried to stop you, but you wouldn't let go. Kitty and Maggie calmed you down, and brought you here."

Lucy took hold of his arm. "Who, Stephen. Who did I attack," she asked him fearfully.

"Mr Mowett, Lucy. You abused him in hearing shot of the crew, and then when he tried to stop you from getting any more drunk than you were, you turned on him."

Lucy thought she would stop breathing. The pain in her head and her arms suddenly disappeared, as all her concentration was channeled to her memory. She could see Will, sitting beside her in the women's mess; she could hear his voice saying _you've had enough; a_nd, to her horror, she could see her fists beating at his chest as she screamed at him to let her go.

With her memory restored, she suddenly felt the bruises on her arms again, and knew that they were inflicted by his hands restraining her. Her head pounded, and her exhaustion overtook her.

_My God, what have I done_, she thought_. How could I have turned on him in that way_?

"It was about Mr Warley," said the doctor gently, seeming to read her mind. "You were angry about his death, and had been into the rum. Mr Mowett could see your distress, and tried to stop you, but you wouldn't have a bar of it." Stephen frowned. "I have always said that grog is the devils invention" he muttered.

But Lucy didn't hear him. Instead she closed her eyes and relived the chain of events which lead her to turn on the man that she loved, and time and time again she shuddered at the memory. She could not believe her actions, and as they gradually sank in, the tears welled in her eyes as she realized that she had lost him not only as a love, but as her friend.

Stephen brushed the hair from her weary face, seeing her tears. "It was the rum, Lucy," he said softly. "I am sure Will would have realized that."

His smile reassured Lucy a little, but she still felt sick from the memory. Stephen's comforting expression, however, turned dark.

"I must also tell you that Mr Mowett has been summoned to the Captain's Cabin, to answer for this outburst. You were insubordinate to an officer, Lucy – you physically attacked him. In the Royal Navy, that is punishable by death."

Death. The word struck in Lucy's ears like a bell. Surely the Captain would not take her life for this. Surely Will would not let him. But then, from what had happened, could she rely on Will to stand up for her?

Lucy knew nothing. All was a blank in front of her. As her head pounded, the doctor urged her to rest on the pillow, and she took his suggestion willingly, curling up in a tight ball to try and keep out the cold which encroached from the decks outside. Her mind was awash with thoughts, and she drifted slowly back to sleep, not knowing what was wrong and what was right anymore.

* * *

"She was insubordinate. She must be punished."

The Captain was pacing the Great Cabin, his anger evident. Will stood near the door, perfectly at attention, taking care not to meet Aubrey's stare.

"She was drunk, Sir" Will said calmly, although his intonation betrayed his annoyance at being summoned to the great cabin over this issue. He felt it was between him and Lucy, and was not impressed that the Captain had decided to make it a formal matter. "In any other circumstance, she would not have behaved in such a manner," he added cooly.

"I don't care," snapped Jack. "She is a member of this crew, and should know better than to insult an officer."

Will had had a long, tiring day, and this was the last thing he needed to hear. He had stood and listened to Aubrey's tirade for some time, and decided it was now time to stand his ground.

"Permission to speak freely, sir."

Aubrey glared at him. "Very well, granted. What do you want to say?"

"She's my friend, sir," Will began. "I have known her for a very long time. I know how close she was to Will Warley, and how much it hurt her when he died. She is tired, and feels very isolated on board this ship, with no support from her Captain. I don't think it's fair to hold one outburst against her."

Will saw Aubrey's eyebrows raise at his comment about no support from the Captain. Will could see it now; He had stood there calmly and listened to Aubrey's comments about Lucy, and her position, and how much he disliked her presence. Lucy was right, he thought. The Captain hated her, and it had to be brought out into the open.

He took a breath and went on. "I dealt with the situation at the time, sir, and I believe it is best if it is not formally brought forward. Instead, I would prefer to speak to Miss Carrington myself, and sort this out informally. With your permission, of course."

Jack paused for a moment. Mowett had taken a chance by speaking in this way to his Captain, and though Jack was not impressed with his assertion that he did not support his crew, he could see where Will was coming from. Inwardly, Jack was very pleased with Mowett's comments. He had trained a competent, strong-willed officer, and for Jack, that was the greatest compliment he could ever have been given.

"You really think you can deal with this on your own, do you?" he asked Will.

"Yes, sir."

Aubrey sighed. He had long ago made up his mind not to punish Lucy, but needed to make a show of it for Mowett to believe that his Captain had conceded a victory.

"Very well, I will leave it in your hands. But it shall be dealt with in the next 24 hours, or I will deal with her myself."

Will concealed his smile. He had won Lucy a reprieve from the cat-o-nine-tails, and he would not have to see her humiliated in front of the crew. It was a victory indeed.

"Thank you, sir," he said quietly, replacing his hat and turning to leave the cabin.

"Mr Mowett," the captain said after him, "I will be dining with the officers this evening. I trust this sorry chain of events will not be raised or referred to? I intend to enjoy this evening, and I expect you to as well."

"Yes, sir" Will responded mechanically. At least he would have enough wine to dull the pain, he thought, closing the door to the Great Cabin behind him as he left.

As he made his way through the crew mess, he saw several curious faces looking him up and down, and heard some odd whispers around him. He kept walking, ignoring them, until he could take it no more. Spinning around, he faced the last man who made a murmured comment, who happened to be Barrett Bonden.

"Would you like to say that to my face, Bonden?" he shouted.

The room went silent. Barrett stood his ground, and looked at Will with compassion. "We, that is, me and the crew, we was just wondering if Miss Carrington is alright, sir." He said quietly.

This was not what Will expected to hear. He looked around, and the faces told him that what Bonden had said was indeed the case. They did not care about Lucy's comments, or her insubordination; they only cared that she was not harmed, and would recover. Their respect and love for Lucy was strong, and the last thing they wanted was for their favourite surgeon's mate to be punished to keep up appearances for them. Lucy may be many things, but in their eyes, she was a lady, and should be treated as such.

Will lowered his guard. "Yes, she will be fine" he said calmly. "The doctor is looking after her. She needs some time to rest and recover, that's all."

Bonden sighed gratefully. "Thank you, sir. That is good news."

Will turned away to continue his path back to his cabin, when Bonden stopped him.

"And you, are you alright, sir" he asked quietly, out of earshot of the other crew members. "I know that you and Miss Lucy are good friends, that's all."

Will looked at Bonden, whom he had known for many years. He had never thought any member of the crew would ever care about his feelings, and he did not know that, over the many years they had served together, Bonden had overheard the conversations Will and Lucy had shared on the Quarterdeck, and was well aware of Will's affection for Lucy. He knew that this situation must have been difficult indeed for the officer to bear.

"Yes, Barrett, I'm alright. Thank you." Will replied with a weak smile.

"Very good, sir," said Bonden, turning without another word to return to his place next to Doodle.

Will continued through the bowels of the ship until he reached his cabin. He closed the door and took off his hat, rubbing his eyes as his exhaustion overtook him.

Tomorrow would not be an easy day.


	11. Chapter 11 Forgiveness

Chapter 11 – Forgiveness.

Gradually, Lucy's bruises had lost their angry appearance, although they were still black on her pale skin, and her head had eventually stopped pounding. She sat up in the sick bay cot, recovering slowly, reading one of the doctor's leather bound volumes, this time about the evils of alcohol.

_Bit late now,_ she thought to herself.

The ship had turned northward during the night, and the temperature had begun to slowly rise, allowing Lucy to take off her heavy black shawl in favour of her light red one. It hid the bruises on her arms; she did not want them visible as a few brave members of the crew made their way to the sick bay to visit the lady. She smiled throughout their visits, insisting that she was fine, and that she had learned not to partake of the evils of rum ever again.

As she read the volume, delicately turning its weatherworn pages, she tried to forget the memory of the day before, but the image of William holding her and trying to stop her blows would not leave her mind. She could feel them, every single one of them, like they were impacting on her own body, and each one felt like the stabbing of a knife. How could he ever forgive her? How could she be so stupid? What was to become of her?

She had waited, patiently, for the Captain to send for her, and prepare her for a hanging, or at the least a whipping, but the order did not come. Instead she learned from the doctor that Mr Mowett had convinced the Captain not to punish her, and instead to leave the situation in his hands. So, she had waited, patiently, for Will to come to sick bay, to scream at her, to tell her he hated her, to tell her anything, but he had not come. Tom had come, young Billy Blakeney had come, and even Mr Allen, who never had time for the women on board, had popped his head in to see that she was alright. But no William Mowett. He was absent from this roll call, and every minute he stayed away felt like a knife twisting in Lucy's heart.

Lucy closed the book. She could not concentrate. The doctor had left the sickbay, leaving her alone, and giving her time with her thoughts, which constantly drifted back to the day before, and the terrible actions she had undertaken. With effort she rose out of bed, taking the book to the shelf behind the instrument cabinet, trying desperately to get those horrible images out of her mind.

"Lucy?"

She turned with a start. It was Will. He was standing near the door, and had closed it behind him as he entered. He looked at her with an intent expression, but no apparent sign of emotion.

Lucy took an inward breath when she saw him, hoping for some hint of feeling in his face, but when she saw none, she sighed and lowered her gaze.

"Have you come to punish me, sir?" she asked him, sitting down in the chair at the doctor's table.

"No, I have come to talk to you," he said quietly, pulling up a chair beside her.

She took care not to meet his gaze, instead looking down at the table respectfully. "Will you permit me to apologise for my outburst, sir," she said quietly, not lifting her eyes. "I acted foolishly, and it was not my intention to be disrespectful to you, sir."

Will looked at her with pity. This was clearly as hard for her as it was for him. He knew they were both in the wrong, that they both played a part in what happened, and that he could not hold her outburst against her. But though he understood that she was feeling very delicate, he could not see why she was speaking to him in this formal way.

"Lucy, why are you talking like this?" he asked her softly. "It's me. It's Will."

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair, and in doing so her red shawl fell from her shoulders, revealing her bruises. She moved quickly to cover them, but Will stopped her, staring at them in horror.

"My God," he said in a half whisper. "Did I do that?"

"It's no more than I deserved, sir" she said quietly, covering her shoulders and looking away.

All of a sudden Will felt sick; sick from humiliation, sick from pity. His Lucy, the woman he loved, had suffered at his hands, at a time when she needed his understanding. She was lonely, and in pain, and instead of helping her, he inflicted more pain on her. He felt lower than a snake, and wished he could sink into the floor rather than feel this humiliation at his own actions. Now, to make it worse, she was telling him that she deserved it. It seemed as though this strong willed woman, who had been through so much in her life, had lost her beautiful independence, and now looked at him in fear, as the man who had inflicted her with pain and been prepared to strike her. It seemed as though she now saw in him the violence of the men she had known in her distant past, and that she was trying to placate him, be compliant, and to keep her place. No; this was not Lucy, not his Lucy. This would not do.

He reached out and lifted her chin to meet his gaze. Her eyes were so beautiful, he thought; so radiant, brilliant and black as the night. Though her face was expressionless, her eyes gave away the depth of her emotion, and when they met his, she felt as though she would surely cry at any moment.

"Lucy, how can you ever forgive me?" he said softly.

Lucy looked into his eyes. He had not slept the night before, and his face showed only his exhaustion. But his eyes showed compassion, kindness, concern; the emotions she had always known from him, and they gave her a glimmer of hope that all was not lost after all.

She gazed at him tenderly. "Forgive you?" she asked. "No, Will, it is I who must ask your forgiveness. It is I who insulted you, who screamed at you, who struck you."

She reached out and touched his jacket where she had hit him, remembering the blows she had inflicted. He took her hand in his and held it to his heart.

"It was out of your control. I understand, Lucy, I do. I know how hard it has been for you." he told her gently.

Will sighed, his eyes never leaving hers. "I should have been there for you, Lucy. I should have understood, and comforted you. Instead, I hurt you, and that's not the way a gentleman treats a lady." As he spoke he lightly traced the line of her shoulder with his other hand, taking care not to touch her bruises.

Lucy smiled in spite of herself. "You should know by now that I am not a lady, Will," she sighed.

"Yes you are," he replied confidently. "You are to me, and always will be."

For a moment they sat, looking into each other's eyes, her hand next to his chest, his hand on her shoulder. They did not speak; it seemed as though their eyes said everything. All the emotion they felt, all the fear, the doubt, the anger, melted away in that gaze, and they felt themselves come to a place they had never been before. For Will, he saw a glimmer of hope that all was not lost, and that there may even be more behind those beautiful eyes, more than he could ever have dreamed of...

Without warning, Lucy collapsed in his arms. Will held her, taking care not to touch her bruises, though he wanted to hold her so tightly he would surely have crushed her under the strength of his emotions. She buried her head in his shoulder, holding him close.

"Please forgive me, Will." She whispered. "I never meant to hurt you."

"Nor I you," he said quietly. "I owe you more than I can ever give you, and pray to God that you can forgive me for your pain." He paused, and enjoyed the feeling of holding her, feeling her warmth, hearing her gentle breathing as she clung to him. They were close. Very close. They had never shown this much affection before, and although they did not cross the invisible boundary that existed between them, they both felt that it might have been slowly dissolving.

"It's alright," Will said softly. "Soon we will have a chance to rest, and all will be well."

"There is never a moment's rest on this ship Will," she sighed, resting her head on his shoulder.

"No, there's not, but there will be on the Galapagos Islands."

She sat up and looked at him. The Galapagos Islands? Was this possible? Lucy had always dreamed of visiting the Galapagos, and now she may have the opportunity.

"The Galapagos? We are going to the Galapagos?"

Will smiled, brushing her dark hair away from her face. "I knew you would like that idea. Yes, the Captain thinks the French privateer will be there, so we are going to find her. He has promised the doctor a visit to the islands, and I am sure you will be welcome on any trip the doctor plans."

Lucy was delighted at the thought of visiting the Galapagos, and looked at Will with sudden joy evident in her beautiful face.

"Now that's the Lucy I know" he grinned.

"No, Will, the Lucy you know is gone. This Lucy is wiser now, and will not let her friendships be threatened again."

She looked into his eyes once more, blue as the ocean, and thought she saw it; something she had not seen, some hint of an emotion beyond their friendship. Could it be true? Could he care more for her than she ever believed? She gazed into his eyes, lost in a trance, oblivious to the outside world...

"Ah, Lucy, you're out of bed."

It was Stephen, standing at the sick bay door. Lucy and Will immediately moved away from each other, giving the appearance of perfect normality.

"Why yes, doctor. Mr Mowett was visiting me, to make sure I was alright."

"That is very kind of you, Mr Mowett," the doctor stated, outwardly devoid of all emotion, as he moved across the room and searched intently for a book on his shelf. When he found it, he turned to face them.

"I do believe Miss Carrington has some work to do, now she is recovered. Don't you, Lucy?" He looked steadily at her over the top of his glasses. Stephen would have no funny business in his sickbay.

"Why yes, doctor," she replied with a smile. "Mr Mowett was just leaving."

Will took the hint. "Yes, indeed sir. I am sure to be wanted above." Will turned to Lucy. "I am so glad to see you are well, Miss Carrington," he said, rising. "Do take care of yourself."

"Thank you, Mr Mowett," she replied cheerfully, shaking his hand. Their action was formal, but their touch betrayed their true emotions.

Will smiled, and left the sick bay, relieved that all was now restored, and that his friendship with Lucy was not lost.

He also left with a question. What was that look he saw in her eyes? Was it more than friendship? Did she really hold stronger feelings for him? Perhaps the Galapagos would give them a chance to be alone together, for the first time in a long time, and finally answer the questions that had been burning in his heart.


	12. Chapter 12 Punishment

Chapter 12 – Punishment

The door of the sick bay slammed hard. The doctor sat down at his desk, furious, opening one of his leather bound volumes, looking for something, anything, to focus his attention on.

Lucy entered quietly, closing the door behind her. She could not recall a time when she had seen him this angry.

"Stephen, what's happening" she asked carefully.

"It appears that we are not to visit the Galapagos Islands after all, Miss Carrington," he answered shortly, not looking up from his book. "The Captain has more pressing engagements than keeping promises to friends."

Lucy's heart sank. She had been looking forward to this trip ever since Will had told her about it, and now that it was so close, it was terrible to think that it would be snatched away from her grasp, but even worse, from Stephen's grasp.

"The _Acheron_ has been sighted," he continued, still studying the pages of his book intently. "The Captain knows its course, and we are to chase it."

She looked at him with pity. This Galapagos trip was more than just a wish for Stephen, it was a dream fulfilled. The Galapagos was the one place in the world where he truly felt that he could do something worthwhile; to discover something new about the world, beyond the confines of this floating world they had called their home for so long. He had set his heart on this trip, and now Jack Aubrey, this man who called himself Stephen's friend, had taken it away in one move, and without warning.

Lucy sat beside the doctor, placing her hand on his. He did not look at her, instead concentrating hard on the page in front of him.

"It's OK, Stephen," she said to him. "I seem to remember you telling me that things work themselves out when you least expect it."

He looked up at her. His expression softened, and she saw the corners of a small smile forming on his featureless face. "Yes, Lucy, they do indeed." He said, returning to his book sadly.

* * *

It had been over a week, and still there had been no wind. No rain. Nothing. Just the sun, and the burning heat of midday. The ocean was as still as a pond, and the _Surprise_ sat in the middle of it all like a toy sailboat, abandoned by a spoilt child in favour of a new distraction.

Lucy was on deck, sitting with Billy Blakeney. They had used this time wisely, with Lucy taking out her sketch pad and pencils to instruct him in the art of drawing. Although he was more keen to draw nature, she began with the ship and its crew, teaching him the rules of perspective and line, and how they worked together to create perfect form. Billy, for his part, had taken in the tuition like a sponge, enjoying every exercise and advancing further in skill every day. She looked at him with pride, knowing that he was enjoying learning almost as much as she was enjoying teaching him.

The days drew on and on, and the crew found themselves helpless in the conditions. They sat on deck, little to do but wait for the wind to return. The one thing they could do was drink, and drink they did. Alcohol was consumed like water, and the results were obvious. Perhaps the most visible was the behaviour of Joseph Nagle who, after one too many rums that morning, had been intentionally disrespectful to Mr Hollam, pushing past him with a blow to the shoulder. Hollam had said nothing, but Captain Aubrey had seen the altercation, and moved to discipline the carpenter's mate for his insubordination. Nagle was taken below and placed in irons, with a whipping set to be carried out at the end of the watch.

For Lucy, this was a difficult time. Although the crew did not believe that she, as a lady, was ever in a position to be whipped as they were, nonetheless she had escaped discipline for her actions towards Will only through his personal intervention. She wished to God that someone would intervene for Joseph, and was relieved when the doctor took up the call. When he went to the Great Cabin to consult with Aubrey, Lucy went on deck, finding Will, Mr Allen and Mr Howard dressing for the ensuing action. She not only had concerns over Nagle's whipping, but also for Hollam's state of mind, and she decided to ask Will for advice.

"Good afternoon, gentlemen," she said to them, feigning cheerfulness.

"Hello, Miss Carrington," replied Mr Howard, putting on his heavy red jacket.

"That's going to be awfully hot this afternoon, Mr Howard," she commented.

"Yes, but I'm afraid dress uniform is necessary on occasions such as this, my dear," he said, fastening his buttons carefully.

Will had been standing there silently, looking at Lucy fondly. Since their reconciliation, they had spent some time together, although much of her time seemed to be spent with Billy Blakeney. Will did not mind; on the contrary, seeing how happy it made her to instruct Blakeney on the fineries of sketching genuinely pleased him. He loved to see her happy, and although he would rather have spent the time with her himself, he was content to stand aside and let Blakeney hold her attention, if only for a little while.

For her part, Lucy would always make sure her sketching trips to the deck with Blakeney coincided with Will's watch wherever possible. She and Billy would sit on the Quarterdeck, where Lucy would instruct him, all the time secretly keeping her eyes firmly fixed on Will. She smiled at his stance, his authority, his command. Everything about him was perfect, and a part of her longed to be close to him again, to know what that look in his eye meant during their encounter in the sick bay.

However, for the moment they were only friends, and it was as a friend that she approached him about this observation that troubled her.

"Mr Mowett, may I speak with you for a moment?" she asked him formally.

"Of course, Miss Carrington," he replied, leading her to the aft deck of the _Surprise_ and away from listening ears.

"What is it, Lucy?" he asked her quietly, beginning to fasten the many buttons on his formal dress jacket.

"It's Robert Hollam," she said with concern. "I am worried about him."

Will looked at her curiously. "Why? What is wrong with him?"

Lucy sat on the seating at the stern of the ship. "The crew have not been kind to him, you know. They think he is the reason for their problems. They think he is why we have lost our wind, and why Will Warley lost his life." She paused, remembering her friend's death and the pain it caused her.

"It's all rubbish, of course" she continued, "Hollam is not responsible for any of it, but I am concerned that he is taking it seriously. I am worried that he might do something rash, Will," she said softly.

Will saw the concern in her eyes, and considered her words carefully. She was fond of all of the midshipman, including Hollam, whom she saw as a man trapped in a boy's world, with no understanding from those around him. She had always been friendly to him, and Will knew that if there was something wrong, Lucy would no doubt be the first to notice it; but he was confident that it was just a simple case of Hollam not fitting in with the crew, and took little mind of it.

"I am sure you are overreacting, Lucy. It's nothing to worry about. Hollam will be fine, I am sure. He's a good lad, you know, even if he is a little sheepish at times."

"I hope you're right" she admitted. "I really don't want him to behave in an irrational manner, all over talk of a stupid curse."

"Relax, Lucy. He'll be fine. Sailors are a funny bunch, after all. Look at me!" he grinned, fastening the last of the buttons on his coat.

_He looks so handsome in his uniform_, she thought. _If only he..._

Her thoughts were interrupted by the striking of eight bells, signalling the end of the watch. She turned to see the doctor emerge from below decks, and the look on his face told her that he had been unsuccessful, and that Nagle was indeed to be whipped for his insolence.

It was time. She stood up beside Will, suddenly conscious of his height in formal uniform, and touched his arm lightly.

"I hate these things," she whispered. "Please let it be over with quickly."

With that, they walked together to the front of the Quarterdeck, and prepared for the worst.


	13. Chapter 13 Reflections

_OK, OK, here's a chapter for all you Pullings fanatics out there...._

Chapter 13 – Reflections

"Miss Lucy, Miss Lucy, wake up! He's gone"

Billy Blakeney was banging on the door of the women's cabin furiously. On hearing his voice, Lucy jumped out of her hammock and wrapped her red shawl around her shoulders, opening the door to find a frantic little boy with a wild expression.

"He jumped, Miss Lucy. He's gone!"

Lucy stared at him blankly. What was he talking about? Who was gone? At that moment Billy grabbed her arm and pulled her from the cabin.

"You must come. You must help!" he said emphatically.

She immediately followed him to the deck, where Tom Pullings, Will and Mr Allen were already in attendance. They were talking quietly to themselves when Lucy appeared, accompanied by Billy, who had calmed a little since Lucy had agreed to go with him to the deck.

She put her hand on Billy's arm, to signal him to remain at a distance, as she ascended the Quarterdeck stairs and approached the officers quietly.

"What happened?" she asked them. "What is he talking about? Who is gone?"

"It's Hollam," said Mr Allen, his emotion evident. "He jumped over the side, with a cannon ball in his hands. Took his own life, the fool."

Lucy stared at Mr Allen in horror. She was right. She knew somehow that Robert Hollam would hurt himself over this, and had said so, but Will had told her it was nothing to worry about. She looked at Will and saw in his face that he remembered her warning, too, and now he realized that it was not an overreaction after all. His regret was evident, and thought it wasn't his fault, he looked away from Lucy's gaze to stop her from seeing the guilt in his eyes.

Tom drew himself up to his full, imposing height. "The Captain must be told," he said formally. "Mr Mowett, will you take the rest of this watch for the time being? I will wake the Captain." His words were those of a ranking officer, but it was clear that he did not want this kind of responsibility. None of them did. As Tom left the deck, he ordered Mr Allen, Lucy and Blakeney back to bed, and they silently obeyed.

Lucy turned to leave, but looked back to the Quarterdeck to Will. He was still looking out into the night, the sadness and shock evident in his eyes.

* * *

The service for Hollam was short, and direct. The Captain addressed anyone who harboured ill feeling for Hollam, and that they should ask for God's forgiveness, as well as Hollam's. The service was shorter than it should be, mainly because in the midst of Captain Aubreys words, the wind returned, allowing the ship to finally gain some propulsion. Aubrey had ordered Will to take command, as he himself returned immediately to his cabin, trying to ascertain how far away the _Acheron_ would be, and where he would have to look if they were to find it.

Lucy sat at the stern of the Surprise, looking out to the empty sea behind her. She was lost in her thoughts; thoughts of Warley, and thoughts of Hollam, and how they had lost their lives for nothing. She also had thoughts of her other friends on the ship, and how their lives could be in danger as this mission went on. Finally, her thoughts drifted to Will, as they always did, and what was to become of their friendship as this mission continued.

She suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to find Tom Pullings standing behind her, two cups of coffee in his hand.

"I thought you might like one of these," he said, handing her a cup.

She smiled and took it gratefully, as Tom took a seat beside her. "We haven't spoken in a while, Lucy. How are you feeling?"

"I'm OK, Tom. Tired, and a little sad, but alright nonetheless."

She looked at his face. He was tired too, she thought, as she considered how hard this mission must have been for him. Tom was an excellent First Officer; competent, commanding, knowledgeable. She also knew that underneath that hard, authoritative exterior was a happy-go-lucky boy with a love for the simple things in life. It saddened her that somehow his happy-go-lucky nature seemed to have become less evident in the past few years, and he had hardened a little from experience, at least when he was on a mission, but she always saw him as the little boy she met all those years ago; the one who loved practical jokes and playing games with his mates in the ship's galley.

Deep in reflection, Tom looked out behind the ship as Lucy had, and sighed. "Yes, I think we are all tired from this mission. It's a shame we could not stop at the Galapagos, but that's just the way it is, I suppose."

For a time they both looked out to the ocean, lost in their own thoughts. At length, Tom turned to her seriously.

"Lucy, is everything alright between you and Will now?" he asked her.

"Yes, everything is fine," she replied, remembering her drunken outburst. "We both made a mistake, although mine was worse – I made the mistake of finding the rum bottle."

Tom smiled. "We were all quite surprised, you know. You, of all people. I don't think I have ever seen you drink more than a small glass of fine red in your life."

"Indeed," she agreed. "Well, I may not even be doing that again, I should think."

Tom smiled again, looking at his friend fondly. At length though, his expression turned serious.

"Will was so hurt by it all, Lucy. He thought he had lost your friendship, and that would have killed him. He cares a great deal about you, you know," he told her. Then realizing what he had said, he added, "we all care about you." _Phew._ _That should cover my tracks_, he thought.

Lucy looked at him fondly. Tom was a good friend, and she knew that he cared for her deeply. "I know, and I am grateful for your concern, my dear," she said, taking his hand. "You know that Will and I are very good friends, and that is very important to me. You know it would take more than a drunken rage to destroy our friendship."

Tom could see in her eyes that her feelings for Will were still there, and still strong. She loved him, that was obvious, and it upset him greatly to know that this love that his dearest friends shared for each other remained hidden, even after all they had been through together.

Tom's affection for Lucy had always run deep. He was never as close to her as William was, but he had a soft spot in his heart for this strong willed lady with her raven hair and mysterious dark eyes. He was never attracted to her, at least not in that way (he much preferred blondes), but he thought her quite pretty, and was firmly of the mind that her intelligence and sharp wit made up for any plainness in her appearance, although he had never said as much to Will. Tom knew that Lucy cared for him and for his future, and longed to see him take up a post as Captain, but a small piece of him was heartbroken at the thought of the three friends being broken up, even for the chance of his own command. For Tom, friends were everything, and Lucy and Will were the closest friends he had ever known. He considered himself honoured to be able to live the life of a sailor, the life that he loved, in the company of the two people who he considered almost family. He was thrilled when Will had revealed his feelings for Lucy, and always hoped that the two would somehow find their way into each other's arms, but now that chance was slipping away fast, and he felt that, as a friend, he must try and do something about it. He put down his coffee cup and placed his other hand on Lucy's, looking at her intently. It was time to confront her.

"Lucy," he said carefully. "I know that Will is important to you, and I think I know just how important. How long will you put yourself through this torment?"

She stared at him blankly. "What do you mean?" she asked him.

He sighed. "You and Will are my best friends in the world, and I know...." He paused. He had promised Will that he would never reveal his friend's feelings for Lucy, and he knew he must tread carefully. "I know that there is more affection between you than meets the eye," he continued, very conscious of his words. "It pains me to see both of you upset, or alone, when....when there could be so much more between you."

Tom had never been the perceptive kind, but it seemed through his words that he could almost read her mind. How did he know? Surely he didn't - Tom was never the kind to understand or care about emotions such as these, though she knew from his own admissions that he had certainly been in love more than once before, or at least in lust. No, Lucy thought that he must be stabbing in the dark, and decided not to let her feelings be openly known to him. After all, he and Will were best friends as boys are best friends, and shared a great deal more about themselves than she was aware of. Of this Lucy was certain.

She smiled sweetly. "Oh, Tom," she laughed, "you are funny sometimes. Will and I are friends, nothing more. You know us so well, my dear, you should know that by now."

She put down her coffee cup and patted his hand affectionately. "I love you both, you know. I am not upset, or alone," she lied. "I have my friends with me whenever I need them. You are both special to me; you are my best friends in the whole world, and I wouldn't have it any other way."

Tom sighed. He could see it was pointless. He knew her too well; she was just as stubborn as William was, and he was well aware just how stubborn that could be.

"Very well, Lucy" he conceded, his disappointment evident. "If you are going to be so stubborn, then I can see there is little I can do to change your mind."

She feigned amusement. "Oh Tom, my, dear, sweet Tom" she laughed, standing and readjusting her shawl on her slender shoulders. "Wherever do you get these ideas from?" With that she turned with a smile and headed back to the sick bay.

Tom remained on the Quarterdeck, looking out behind the ship. He had tried, and failed. It was up to Will to make the move, he thought; it was obvious that Lucy would not budge.


	14. Chapter 14 Confrontation

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: This one was hard. Until now, none of the action has directly come from the film, instead coming from scenes which happened around it. Now I am writing a little of a scene which already exists in the film. Unfortunately there is no way around it, but the changes make sense, so hopefully it works...._

Chapter 14 – Confrontation

Since the return of the wind, the _Surprise_ had made excellent speed. The Captain had a very good idea where the_ Acheron_ would be headed, and had directed the ship accordingly, speeding her across the waves in a desperate attempt to catch up with the French privateer.

The day had dawned perfectly sunny, the crew going about their daily chores as normal, while Lucy and the doctor had decided to take a turn on the deck. In fact, the suggestion was Lucy's; it was Will's watch, and she longed for her daily visit with him. Unfortunately for Lucy, the Captain was also on deck this day, supervising various activities from his position on the Quarterdeck. His presence meant that Lucy was relegated to the forecastle, although Will's smile upon seeing her emerge from below decks made her feel a little better, despite their physical separation.

The doctor, however, was transfixed by a visitor. An albatross was following the _Surprise_, circling and darting between the sails with incredible grace. Stephen, ever one to be entranced by nature, followed the bird as it made its way around the deck effortlessly.

Little did Stephen know that Mr Howard had also been following the path of the albatross, rifle in hand, ready to shoot. The bird was good sport to James Howard, and he loved nothing more than to be part of a trigger-happy chase.

The albatross swung around the ship, darting here and there, swooping low and swinging far. The doctor followed it, jumping across the rigging for a closer look. As the bird swung low, Mr Howard aimed and took his shot.

Bang!

Stephen held onto the ropes for support, but felt his legs give way under him. The bullet had taken him in the stomach.

Captain Aubrey was immediately at his side, as was Lucy. She made a cursory examination of his wound, as the Captain ordered Mr Calamy to fetch Higgins. Lucy looked at Aubrey incredulously, as Stephen was gently lifted and carried to the sick bay.

Richard Higgins was the second surgeons mate on board the _Surprise_. He had been taken aboard at the insistence of the Captain, who believed that Miss Carrington was not sufficient to provide assistance to the doctor when the need arose. Higgins was no doctor; he had not trained, nor had he ever listened to the doctor's tuition of Miss Carrington. He was an assistant, and a bad one at that. His knowledge was far inferior to Lucy's, but the fact that he was a man was enough for Aubrey to look upon him as the next in line to assist the doctor in his time of distress.

Stephen's limp form was laid out on the operating table in the sick bay. When his shirt was removed, it was clear that a piece of fabric had been taken in with the bullet. Lucy knew the danger of this situation. She looked at Higgins; his face showed his fear. He knew he was out of his depth, and he looked to Lucy for assistance.

She took the doctor's shirt out of Higgins hand and approached the Captain, who was standing a little way from the table.

"The bullet has taken in a piece of shirt with it." She told him quietly. "Unless it's removed, it's going to suppurate and fester." The tone in her voice showed her concern, although the Captain did all he could to ignore her.

"Higgins, are you up to the task?" he asked the terrified assistant.

Lucy stared at Aubrey in shock. Why had he ignored her? He must know that she was the only one on board qualified to operate on Stephen, and yet he had directed the request to operate to Higgins. Did he really hate her that much that he would risk his friend's life for the sake of propriety?

Higgins stared at Aubrey blankly. "I would have to read up on some of the doctors books, like. Study some pictures he has."

Aubrey looked at him, his surprise evident. "Study some pictures?" he said slowly.

"It's just to get my bearings, that's all," replied Higgins defensively. "Would be a lot easier if we were on dry land," he continued, but Aubrey did not hear him. All he was conscious of was Stephen, lying in pain on the table, and Lucy Carrington, her eyes burning into him with undisguised hatred and disbelief.

"Do what you can, Mr Higgins" the Captain said, turning to leave. He did his best to ignore Lucy, but felt her gaze burrow into him like a knife. _Am I doing the right thing?_ he asked himself as he left the sick bay. _Stephen says she is more than competent, but how can a woman be as competent as a man in this situation?_ _No, I will leave it to Higgins. I am sure he will be fine._

With that thought he retired to his cabin, with orders not to be disturbed unless the _Acheron_ was sighted.

* * *

Lucy sat at Stephen's bedside, gently patting his forehead with a cloth to calm his clammy skin. She examined his wound again; it was serious. Nothing important had been punctured, thank God, but the piece of fabric must be removed, or it would surely kill him.

Higgins was sitting in the corner of the sick bay, a book open in his lap. He regularly took large swigs of wine as he drank, trying to calm down at the sight of the graphic pictures in the heavy volume. He knew this was beyond him, but what could he do? He was told to operate, and must try. At least he would have Miss Lucy there to help him, a thought which comforted him. Perhaps he could stand back and leave it to Lucy. The Captain would not know, would he?

Lucy looked at him with pity. She was fond of Higgins and his simplicity, and knew that this was something that terrified him. He wanted so much to hand the responsibility to her, and she was willing to take it, but it was out of her hands. Stephen's life was in danger, and that, too, was out of her hands.

_No, this cannot be_, she thought. _Something must be done._

Lucy left the sick bay and went up on deck, determined to find for Captain Aubrey. When she reached the Quarterdeck, she saw the officers, talking quietly amongst themselves, obviously troubled.

She quietly approached Will, who was standing a little to the side of the group. "Will, where is the Captain? I must speak with him."

"He's gone below, Lucy. I think he is in his cabin." He said quietly, obviously distracted.

"What's happening?" she asked him. "Why is everyone so concerned?"

"We've sighted the _Acheron_," he replied, pointing to a shape a little of the starboard bow. He handed her the spyglass, and she could clearly make out the French flag flying from the back of the frigate.

"He has not ordered us to beat to quarters, or to follow," said Will. "He hasn't ordered anything. He just left, without a word. We think he went below." Although the officers were competent leaders in their own right, the fact that this had happened, and the Captain had simply left them without any order, completely bewildered them, and they found themselves unclear as to the move they should take.

Lucy considered Aubrey's actions. _He is distracted_, she thought. _Distracted by thoughts of Stephen's condition, no doubt. I think it is a good time to speak to him._

"I will find the Captain" she whispered to Will. "I know what the problem is, and maybe I can fix it."

Lucy turned and briskly walked towards the Great Cabin. When she reached it, she knocked softly on the door.

"I am not to be disturbed," came a voice from within.

Lucy knew it was now or never, and that he hated her anyway. She had nothing to lose. She gently turned the handle and opened the door, making her way inside.

She found the Captain sitting in his chair, staring absently at Stephen's cello, which was propped against a chair a little to his right. He looked up to see Lucy, standing in the doorway.

"Miss Carrington, I said I was not to be disturbed." His words were direct, but his intonation gave away his deep emotion.

"I know, but we need to talk," she replied confidently. She moved towards him and picked up a chair, placing it beside him.

"I know you don't like me," she began, slowly sitting down, "but this is not about like or dislike, Captain. You must know by now that I don't like you either, so at least we are even."

His expression was shocked, but his strength had been drained by worry, and he could not bring himself to chastise her. Something told him that he needed to hear what this woman had to say, and he kept himself as calm as he could, despite his annoyance at her insolence.

"I know that Stephen is your friend," she continued. "Well, he is my friend, too. He is like a brother to me, the closest thing I have to family." She looked fondly at Stephen's cello, so lonely in the corner without its master. "The last thing I want is for him to die for the sake of a dislike between us."

Jack looked at this woman. Even though she had spent years on his ship, he had never spoken at length with her before, and was quite surprised at her intelligence. He had always assumed that Lucy Carrington was a silly little girl, but her voice and her words betrayed a much deeper intellect that he was not aware of until this moment.

Lucy took a breath, and continued. "I know that you think that because I am a woman, I am not competent to be a surgeon. Well, sir, that is not true," she stated, looking him in the eye. "I have spent years in the doctor's training, and am more than capable of operating in my own right."

The Captain's expression had softened during her speech, and he looked at her with more understanding than she had ever seen from him. His face, however, was troubled.

"Can you really save him?" he asked, still uncertain. "Do you really have the knowledge and the skill needed?"

Lucy could see that he was wrestling inside with this idea, and how hard it was for him to change a lifetime of negative opinion about women. She moved closer to him, and placed her hand gently on his. It was a gamble, but she had to try.

"I have been his student for a long time, Jack," she said softly. "I have watched his every move, listened to every instruction. I know that I am the only one on this ship who can save him. All I ask is that you give me the chance to do it."

Aubrey was amazed. This woman, whom he had put down and belittled for so long, was nothing like he had imagined. She was wise, and intelligent, but she was also brave. Very brave. She had entered his cabin and spoken to him in a way that no other crewmember would, but she did it with such conviction that he believed her words, and suddenly began to entertain the hope that his dear friend would live through this trial after all.

He looked at her beautiful face, her honestly and intent evident. _She's right,_ he thought. _She is the only one who can save him, but perhaps I can also help in my own way ..._

"Very well," he finally conceded. "Operate, Miss Carrington. Save him, if you can. I will do my part, and fulfill a promise that I made to Stephen that should never have been broken."

Aubrey rose out of his chair. His mind was made up.

"We are going back to the Galapagos Islands."


	15. Chapter 15 The Galapagos

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: Again, another scene I have changed, ever so slightly. Hope you approve. Oh, and for those who have been a bit upset by Aubrey being such a bastard, here he finally has the chance to redeem himself..._

Chapter 15 – The Galapagos

The tent was well lit by the many lanterns surrounding the doctor's cot. He lay there, cold and clammy, his skin a much paler shade than usual. The night outside was dark – there moon was hidden by heavy cloud – and various members of the crew waited in the darkness anxiously for news of the doctor's operation, and its success or failure.

The Surprise had arrived at the Galapagos that afternoon, and Captain Aubrey had immediately ordered that a tent be erected for Stephen. The crew had carried him gently from the beach, and had placed him in his makeshift home. Lucy was already there, preparing for the operation, laying out the necessary instruments in readiness.

The Captain was there, too, watching Lucy move with intent and confidence. The past few days had seen Aubrey's opinion of this woman radically change; he now saw her not as a simple, silly girl, but as the potential saviour of his friend, and someone who, as difficult as it seemed to him, shattered all of his conceptions of what a woman could and could not do.

"Ready, Miss Carrington?" he asked her.

She glanced up at him. "Ready, sir," she said confidently.

"No."

Stephen's voice was shaky, but determined. "I do this with my own hand."

"No, Stephen," said Lucy, her concern evident. "You can't. You won't stay conscious, the pain will be too great."

"It's not your decision to make, Lucy," he replied weakly. "I know you can do it, but it's my choice, and that choice is to operate myself."

Aubrey and Lucy looked at him in shock, but they both knew better than to argue with him. Lucy put down her instruments and moved to her wooden trunk, finding a mirror buried under some skirts. She brought it over and handed it to Higgins, who was standing at the end of the bed. She sat at Stephen's bedside, ready to assist him. The Captain also remained in the sick bay, ready to lend a helping hand if required.

They all held their breath as Stephen took up the gatling, ready to make the first incision.

* * *

The night was brisk, but not too cold. Lucy stood on the shore, looking out into the darkness, though the moon had now emerged from behind the cloud, giving the night sky a soft, friendly glow. The breeze was gentle, and Lucy enjoyed it as it gently brushed away the hair on her porcelain face. She stood for a moment, reflecting on the events that had just taken place.

It was a success, thank God. Stephen had remained conscious throughout the procedure, and she had been able to help him, finally allowing him to relax when the bullet was removed and she could take over the final steps on her own. Now he was resting, and Lucy had taken the opportunity to take a walk and clear her head.

The ground felt good beneath her feet. It was wonderful to feel the earth, and not the decks of the ship for a change. For all Lucy's love of the ocean, and of the life she had lived as the doctor's assistant, she still felt an affinity for the land, more so she thought than any other member of the crew, except perhaps for the doctor himself. She took off her soft leather shoes to feel the beach sand underneath her feet. It felt good as she scrunched her toes, feeling the grains of soft sand against her skin. She walked steadily along the shore, listening to the crashing waves, and glancing up at the stars above her.

This was the first time in a long time that she felt she was truly alone. For the first time in a long time she could stand and reflect on the many things that had happened, and come to terms with them. She could finally be apart from the others, and be happy in her own company. She felt at peace; more so than she had for many long months, and it felt good. She remembered the words of the doctor weeks before: "...things have a habit of working themselves out..." he had said, and he was right. Here she was, standing on the shore of the most beautiful islands in the world, a peace in her heart that she feared she would never feel again.

She looked up at the stars above her just in time to see one shoot like an arrow across the dark sky. _I must make a wish,_ she thought quickly. _I wish...._

Wish for what? Without hesitation her thoughts turned to Will. With her reflection on the events of late, she also reflected on her relationship with him. It had suffered, and it had strengthened. He had been there for her, beside her, showed her support when she felt she deserved none, and even when she turned on him in a fit of rage, he had stood by her, and protected her from the Captain's anger. He had never let their friendship go, and she felt closer to him now that she ever had in the past.

Lucy smiled. Perhaps now they could have a chance to be alone together, here on the Galapagos. Perhaps now they could be even closer, and share more than they had in the past. The questions she had in her heart about their relationship were more pressing now, and she wanted so much to be with him, to finally find the courage to tell him how much he meant to her.

"Miss Carrington, may I speak with you?"

Captain Aubrey had come down to the shore, seeing the lady standing near the crashing waves. He needed to raise an issue with her which he had been in his mind for a few days.

"Of course, Captain," she replied. Lucy, for her part, had softened her stance against Aubrey since he had turned back to the Galapagos, and found herself actually coming to like the gruff and direct manner of this man whom she had despised to completely in the not so distant past.

"It is a relief that Stephen is alright," Jack began, looking out at the ocean before him. "The operation was a success, was it not?"

"Yes, it was," Lucy agreed. "The piece of shirt was removed, the bullet was removed, and the wound was closed. I do believe he will recover nicely, sir."

"Yes, very good news," said Aubrey. He was clearly nervous about something, and shuffled uncomfortably in the sand.

"Miss Carrington, I keep remembering your words in my cabin of a week ago. You said 'you don't like me, and I don't like you, so we are even', if I recall correctly."

Lucy winced. She had indeed spoken those words to Aubrey, and perhaps now he was going to take her to task for it.

"I believe that there is something to what you said," he finally admitted.

Lucy looked at him with surprise. "I didn't like you, Lucy," he continued. "I thought you were a silly little girl, with no place on board my ship. I don't think that's the case any more."

Jack kicked the sand beneath him nervously. This was not easy for him, but he had to clear the air with her. He took a deep breath. "I think you are the most competent, intelligent woman I have ever met," he said, though it was obvious that the words were very difficult for him to say.

Lucy was stunned. He had never even said boo to her in the past, and now, after all of the events surrounding Stephen and his brush with death, Aubrey had finally seen that she was a surgeon in her own right, and that she did indeed have a place as a part of the _Surprise_ crew. She knew that his negative opinion of her had not been shaken lightly, and she looked at him with a mix of pity and gratitude. Perhaps they could start afresh?

"Thank you, Captain," she said, her own nerves evident. "That is probably the nicest thing you could ever have said to me."

Aubrey went on. "I was hoping we could put all of this behind us, Lucy. Wipe the slate clean, so to speak? I will stop thinking of you as a silly little girl, and you can stop thinking of me as a chauvinist, pig headed old bastard."

She smiled broadly in spite of her nervousness. "I don't think I have thought of you quite in that way, sir," she laughed.

Aubrey looked her in the eye. "Yes, you have, Lucy," he said confidently, the hint of a smile also softening his hard features.

Lucy's expression grew serious. "Perhaps I did," she conceded. "But that was the past. Let's put that behind us, sir, and work together, rather than in opposition. Agreed?" She put out her hand to shake on their agreement.

Jack took her hand and shook it gently. To her surprise he then placed his other hand on hers and held it warmly.

"Yes, let us work together, my dear," he said softly.

They stood for a moment, looking out to the ocean. It had been a difficult day. Suddenly Lucy was aware of her exhaustion, and she desperately needed rest.

"I am afraid I must bid you good evening, sir. My tiredness has quite overtaken me."

She pulled her shawl around her shoulders and smiled at him.

"Good night, Captain Aubrey, and thank you" she said, genuinely grateful for his kindness. She turned and made her way slowly along the beach to the camp, and the tent he had arranged for her.

"Good night, Miss Carrington" he replied as she departed. As Jack watched her walk steadily to camp, he smiled, and found himself thinking out loud.

_Mowett is a fool if he lets her go_...


	16. Chapter 16 Shore Leave

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: I loved this chapter, it was nice to write. It's one for all you romantic girls out there, who would love a man to actually be this thoughtful. Guys, take note; do this for your lady, and she will love you forever...._

Chapter 16 – Shore Leave

_My dear Lucy,_

_Be ready at noon. I have a surprise for you._

_Will._

Lucy read the note again and again. What did it mean? What was this surprise he had planned for her? It was not like Will to surprise her with anything, but then she knew that he had not been himself for the past few days, and anything was possible.

For most of the crew, including William, land was a foreign place. They did not feel right when off the ship, believing that the sea was where they were born to be. But with Will, this time it was different. Since they had arrived at the Galapagos, he had been so comfortable, so at home, that he seemed to be a different person. She knew that he was looking forward to the rest, but never realized that being in this most beautiful place could bring him as much peace as it clearly brought to her.

It was just past noon now, and she waited in her tent patiently for him to arrive. _I must not show too much excitement_, she thought nervously_. I cannot give too much away._

As the minutes ticked over, they felt like hours, until finally she heard his voice at the door of her tent.

"Lucy, may I come in?" he asked through the canvas.

"Of course, Will," she replied, checking herself to stay calm and nonchalant about the entire situation.

He entered her tent. He was out of uniform, instead in a soft white shirt, dark pants, and a simple but elegant green jacket, trimmed with the finest gold brocade. She had never seen him dressed this way before, and it almost took her breath away when she realized how handsome he was out of uniform. The only consolation he made was his uniform top hat, which he was carrying casually in his right hand.

"I'm sorry I'm late," he began apologetically. "I had a devil of a time finding a suitable basket."

She looked at him curiously. His face gave away no hint of emotion. "A suitable basket?" she asked him slowly.

"Yes, indeed," he replied, raising his hat to shield her view from the tent door.

He paused, looking into her eyes fondly. "I thought.....a picnic," he said softly, slowly lowering his hat out of her vision just as Kitty entered the tent with a beautiful weaved basket, filled with the finest breads and cheeses he could find, and a bottle of the captain's best red wine.

Lucy saw the basket almost squealed from excitement. "Will, it's lovely!" she exclaimed, quickly regaining her composure and laughing happily. "What a wonderful idea!"

Smiling, Will offered her his arm and, taking the basket from Kitty, the two of them left the tent and made their way down the soft grass away from the camp, leaving more than a few amused crew members in their wake.

* * *

The day was bright and sunny, and the picnic was a roaring success. Will and Lucy sat and talked, nibbling away at cheese and bread and sipping wine, for what seemed like hours. They talked about the islands, the mission, the ship, the Captain's change of heart, everything and anything. She told him about the doctor's plans to search the islands for new species the next morning, and it was evident that this prospect was truly thrilling to her. Will smiled as she described all the plants and animals she intended to draw; her face was so bright, her excitement obvious. Although he was not as taken by the world of natural history as she was, it gave him the greatest delight to hear her speak of something which gave her such immense joy, and he sat back, listening to her describe giant tortoises and strange birds with a passion that made him smile.

Lucy could not clearly remember what it was they talked about during their picnic, but she knew that it was a conversation which saw them back to the way they had been in the past; the closest of friends, and the dearest of companions. She saw him relax, and become more at peace with her than he had been in a long time, which in turn gave her immense joy.

By late afternoon they had packed up their basket and, at Lucy's insistence, they headed to the deserted beach that was not far away. Lucy had heard the waves, and longed to be closer to the action. Will had been more than happy to follow her; this afternoon was just what he needed to recharge and relax away from the pressures of command.

When they reached the beach, its beauty almost took their breath away. The sand seemed to stretch on for miles, with soft, yellow grains which melted away under their step. Lucy took off her shoes as she had that evening with the Captain, and felt the sand under her feet.

"It's so soft," she smiled at Will. "It's just perfect."

She scrunched her toes a little longer in the sand, and cast a glance longingly at the water ahead of her.

"I wonder what that feels like," she said cheekily.

With a giggle she ran to the water's edge, leaving Will to follow. She skipped along the crashing waves, holding her skirt so as not to get it wet, laughing as she ran through the water. He followed from the beach, watching her, spellbound by her every move. She was so happy, happier than he had ever seen her. This day was perfect, he thought. All of a sudden the barriers that seemed to exist between them in the recent past melted away, and it had never felt this good.

She ran back to him on the beach and collapsed on the sand, smiling happily. "That was a lot of fun" she laughed. "Almost too much!"

"You can never have too much fun, Lucy," He laughed as sat down beside her.

Lucy smiled at him. They were in their own little world it seemed. She felt that she could say anything to him, and it would all be right, and for the first time in her life, she took a chance and allowed the walls around her heart to slowly crumble.

"Can I ask you something, William?" she started.

"Of course."

"Why have you never married? You are an eligible gentleman, an officer in the King's Navy. There must have been many ladies who have fancied you, and yet you remain a bachelor. Why?"

He knew this would come, and Will admitted to himself that he was not entirely prepared for it, but his worries had melted away as the afternoon progressed, and he decided that it was time to tell her about the letter.

"Well, now that you mention it, I have only recently had an offer of marriage arranged by my father."

Lucy thought her heart stopped beating, even just for a moment. She tried to hide it, but Will noticed the sudden change in her expression before she had a chance to conceal her shock.

"You hadn't told me this before," she said quietly, trying to be cheerful and hide her true emotions.

"No, it was something I had to think about on my own," he admitted, suddenly quite embarrassed that he had not mentioned it before now.

"Who is she?" Lucy asked. Inside she really didn't want to know, but a part of her insisted, and she asked the question anyway.

"Her name is Elizabeth Pemberley," he began. "She is the daughter of the Admiral Lord Pemberley. I met her briefly at Portsmouth before we sailed. You remember, at the Governor's banquet?"

Lucy recalled the party that the doctor had attended at the Governor's residence, two evenings before the _Surprise_ had left on its mission. She also recalled that she was not invited.

"Anyway," he continued, "my father seems to think the same way that you do, and that I need a wife, so he made the arrangements with Admiral Lord Pemberley, and wrote to me asking if I would consent to the marriage."

Will thought of the letter, still stuffed into his jacked pocket back at camp. With all the activity surrounding their mission, he had been able to put it out of his mind until this moment. Now that he recalled it, and its contents, he suddenly felt the same torments that he had when he had received it, and recalled his father's insistence that he put his family first, and accept this very advantageous offer.

Lucy held her breath. "And what did you decide? Will you accept the proposal?"

Will looked at Lucy with affection. Her face was calm, but her eyes betrayed a much deeper emotion that he had ever seen before. She almost seemed afraid as she looked up at him, waiting for his answer. Underneath the calm façade Lucy's heart was beating so fast she thought it would explode in her chest. This was it. Now she knew the truth of the letter, and that it contained something that could destroy all of her chances of happiness. Somehow she knew what he had decided – that he would indeed marry this Pemberley girl – and that with one word he would shatter her dreams into a million pieces.

Will paused. What could he say? He had not made a decision about the Pemberley offer, purely on the grounds of his feelings for Lucy. Should he tell her? What if the feeling was not returned? He thought he saw so much more in her eyes those weeks before, something more than friendship, but he could not be sure. He knew that he had to act, and act quickly, and that whichever path he chose, he could lose a friendship, and any chance of something more, with this most radiant of women who sat trembling before him.

Will steeled himself, and took a deep breath. This was it....

"Miss Lucy, Miss Lucy, you must come quickly."

Billy Blakeney came running down the beach in a panic. Lucy immediately sat up and looked across the sand towards him.

"What is it, Billy? What's happened?"

"It's Mr Boyle, Miss Lucy. He has cut open his arm very badly, and we cannot stop the bleeding. The Captain has asked that you look at him urgently."

Lucy sighed, a sigh of relief. "Very well, Billy, I am coming."

She looked at Will. The relief was also evident in his face, as he returned her measured gaze. She knew that something was coming when he began to speak, something that she probably would not like, and although she had prepared herself for the worst, she still did not want to hear what she felt certain was coming: the news that he was to marry Elizabeth Pemberley.

"I'm afraid I have to go. Duty calls," she said.

"Of course, my dear," he replied quietly.

"Are you coming back with me?" she asked him.

He looked out at the ocean. "No, I think I will stay here for a time," he replied, wanting to be alone with his thoughts a little longer.

Lucy smiled at him, standing up. "Very well," she said. "It was a lovely picnic, Will. Thank you so much." Her expression was more formal than usual, perhaps due to Billy's presence, but her eyes were tender, and he returned her look with affection.

"You are welcome, Lucy," he said, smiling.

Lucy turned and followed Billy across the sand and back to the camp not far away. Will watched her leave, his thoughts tainted with a myriad of emotions. He closed his eyes and sighed. He knew the time had come. He had to decide, one way or the other, about his feelings for Lucy Carrington, and if he was to act on them.

* * *

_Had you there, didn't I? Don't panic, there's more to come.....!_


	17. Chapter 17 Inspiration

Chapter 17 – Inspiration

The Captain's table had been decked out in the finest china and silver for this evening's dinner, a celebration of the doctor's return to health. The doctor himself was in attendance, along with the senior officers, and young Blakeney, invited at the insistence of the doctor, as he, like Lucy, had grown very fond of the boy. They guests sat at their various places around the table, chatting amongst themselves, conversation and wine flowing freely.

"So Mr Boyle is alright now, is he?" the Captain asked Stephen.

"Yes. Nothing serious, just a gash to the arm. Nothing Miss Carrington could not handle."

Will did not hear the words being spoken around him. All he could see was Lucy's face from that afternoon, and her apparent shock at learning about his proposal. He was lost in his thoughts, trying to determine the best way to approach the situation. He had not seen her since he returned to camp, but knew that he must confront her, and his feelings soon, no matter how difficult it may seem.

The Captain also noticed his Second Officer's absent gaze. "You seem distracted, Mr Mowett," he noted. "How was your picnic this afternoon? I trust Miss Carrington is well?" The Captain had learned of Will's picnic plans with Lucy, and had suggested the bottle of wine that Will had packed in their basket. He thought it would make a nice touch, and be a gesture of thanks for all Miss Carrington had done to help his friend back to health.

"Ah, yes, sir," Will replied absently. "She is well." He regained his composure before he continued. "She is very pleased that the doctor is recovered, as are we all." He said carefully, trying to change the subject.

"Yes, we certainly are," agreed Aubrey, filling another glass with wine. "You had us worried there, Stephen."

Stephen seemed shy in the light of the attention. He did not want this dinner at all, but Jack had insisted, saying that the doctor was a special part of the crew, and his recovery should be celebrated. Stephen had relented, but did not enjoy it; rather he retired shyly to his own thoughts, hoping that he would be ignored by the other members of the party.

But it was not to be. Aubrey raised his glass in a toast. "Gentlemen," he said, "a toast to Doctor Maturin, and to his continued good health."

"To Doctor Maturin" the table guests echoed, while Stephen smiled sheepishly and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"Thank you, gentlemen, you are too kind." He said quietly.

"Not at all," said the Captain. "It is a relief that you can take your position as our doctor again."

"And also that you can accompany us on our trek tomorrow, sir," added Blakeney, the wine starting to go to his head.

"Why yes, indeed," agreed Aubrey enthusiastically. "I hear it should be a wonderful trip, Mr Blakeney?"

"Yes, sir, it shall. We will be looking for as many new species as we can, and Miss Carrington and I will be sketching all of the natural wonders of the island." Blakeney's excitement was evident as he spoke.

Aubrey smiled. He liked Blakeney, and looked upon the boy's interest in nature with amusement. "You like natural history and drawing animals and plants, don't you Mr Blakeney?" he asked.

Billy's face lit up again. "Yes sir, I do. It is truly wonderful. Miss Carrington has shown me how to draw, and I do believe I am getting better every day." He said brightly.

The words "Miss Carrington" had caught Will's attention, and brought him out of his daze. He looked at Blakeney, well aware from conversations with Lucy just how much the boy enjoyed his drawing and learning about the world around them. Just as quickly, though, Will's mind wandered, and he was lost in his thoughts again.

"Excellent, Mr Blakeney," said Aubrey, smiling and taking another sip of his wine. "It's always good to do partake of something that's close to your heart."

Billy was looking cheerily at the Captain, sitting at the far end of the table, when Aubrey noticed that suddenly they boy's expression grew troubled.

"Is that not the case, Mr Blakeney?" he asked the boy intently.

Billy frowned; the wine was making him see double. "Yes, sir, but it is very hard, sir. I don't know if I am any good, or if I should do it at all sir. I want to be a Captain, and don't know if this is something that will help me to achieve that goal. I do enjoy it sir, but perhaps it is all just a waste of time." His child-like honesty was charming, and it gave Aubrey an idea.

"Well, Mr Blakeney, you don't stop doing something because it is difficult, do you?" he asked the boy, casting a sidelong glance at Will. He had to get his Second Officer's attention. "I am sure Miss Carrington has taught you that already, hasn't she?" he added.

As suspected, the mention of Lucy's name drew Will's attention, and he began to listen intently to the Captain's words.

"Listen, young man," Aubrey continued to the young midshipman. "Sometimes things are difficult to do. Sometimes you don't know if you should do them, but something in your heart tells you its right, and you have to go for it. Something deep inside you says 'you need this, it is a part of you', and there's nothing you can do to stop it."

Aubrey paused. Seeing that Mowett was still listening, he continued. "It may not be easy, and you may think that it is easier to just let it go and keep living without it, but in the end, you know that you must take the chance, or your life will never be happy. If it is a part of you, you have to make sure you keep it that way. Never give up on something worthwhile, Mr Blakeney, or you will never forgive yourself. Wouldn't you agree, Mr Mowett?" he asked Will in conclusion, casually sipping wine from his glass.

Will sat quietly, reflecting on everything his captain had said. He looked at Aubrey, and immediately knew from Jack's expression that this speech was not directed at Blakeney, but at Will himself. He had suspected that the Captain was aware of his feelings for Lucy, and now it seemed that Aubrey had decided to tell his Second Officer exactly what he thought should be done about them.

"Um, yes, sir, I do agree, completely," Will stammered, as his Captain's words slowly sunk in.

Aubrey smiled at Mowett, a calm, knowing smile, then turned back to Blakeney. "See, it's simple. If you love it, do it," he said. "Now, where is the main course?"

The rest of the meal was a blur to Will; all he could hear were the Captains words: "...you must take a chance, or your life will never be happy..."; "..never give up on something worthwhile...". He heard them time and time again, repeating in his memory. The more he heard them, the more sense they made to him. Will had been so happy with Lucy that day, happier than at any time in his life, and he longed to have her by his side. She was everything to him, and he knew that if he was to be happy, he must take a chance and tell her how he felt. If he didn't, how would he know if she could ever love him in return? Aubrey was right. Will couldn't live his life not knowing what could have been, and the time had come to tell her, to tell her the truth, to lay it on the line once and for all.

The dinner concluded with the guests departing the tent for their own quarters. Will lingered behind, meaning to ask a favour of his Captain. He found himself strangely calm, somehow relieved by his decision to finally make his feelings known to the woman he loved.

"Excuse me, sir, May I ask a favour of you?" he said to Aubrey when the others had left.

"Of course, Mr Mowett." Aubrey replied, slurring slightly from his many glasses of wine.

"May I borrow that decanter of wine?" he asked, pointing at the half empty bottle on the table. "I have something I need to do."

Aubrey smiled. His speech had worked. "Certainly, Mr Mowett. Be my guest. It is a lovely drop," he added, as Will picked up the decanter from the table. On an impulse Jack reached across to one of his many cabinets and retrieved two crystal wine glasses, passing them to Will.

"You will need these, too, I should think" he grinned.

Will smiled back at him. No words were exchanged, but the look on Will's face showed his gratitude to his Captain, not only for his understanding, but for helping him see the true nature of his feelings, and what he needed to do.

Taking the glasses, Will silently left the Captain's tent and looked out into the night. The moon was up, and though it was only a crescent, the lights from the camp more than made up for its childlike glow. He walked with purpose across the makeshift compound. No-one was around, aside from the odd marine on patrol. He was grateful. This was between him and Lucy, and he wanted to keep it that way.

As he approached her tent, his heart started to quicken. This was it. The nerves that he had abandoned at the Captain's table had suddenly returned, and he felt less certain of himself, but he tried hard to ignore them.

_No, this must be done,_ he thought_. I love her, I have to tell her now. Never give up on something worthwhile..._

With that thought, he walked purposefully to the door of her tent.

"Lucy," he called softly through the canvas, "are you awake?"

"Yes, Will," came the voice from within. "Come in."

He took a deep breath and lifted the tent flap, letting it fall behind him. Now there was no turning back.

* * *

_Will Mowett finally get some action?? Yay!_


	18. Chapter 18 Revelations

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: FINALLY! Yes, for your reading pleasure, here, at last, is THE scene. Oh, how exciting! It isn't graphic per se, but there are some adult themes here, so it ain't for the youngsters. Ahh, l'amour...._

Chapter 18 – Revelations

Lucy was sitting at a small table in her tent, a mirror propped up behind it. She was brushing her soft, dark hair, quietly humming to herself. This had been a day mixed with emotions, but she decided to focus on the best parts of the day, and try to forget the news that had broken her heart.

She recalled the picnic with Will, and how wonderful it had been. He had created the perfect day, and she was so thrilled to have been a part of it. She recalled their conversation, their walk along the beach, the feeling of the sand between her toes and the cold ocean water breaking against her skin as she ran through the surf. It was perfect; perfect until that moment, when he had told her of the letter, and the proposal it contained.

Lucy stopped humming and stared absently at her own reflection. Although Will had never answered her question, she felt as though she knew what he was going to say, particularly as she had not seen him since the picnic. If he had rejected the offer with the Pemberley girl, surely he would have told her? Why did he hesitate? No, he was to accept it, of this she was certain. She felt her heart start to break, knowing that he would have to tell her eventually, but that he would probably ignore her for as long as possible. She was sure that this afternoon, the most perfect afternoon of her life, was the last time she would ever spend alone with William Mowett.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice outside her tent, calling her name.

"Lucy, are you awake?"

Her heart started to beat faster. It was William. He had come to see her. The news she did not want to hear was about to come, and she knew that she had to face it.

_Well, better late than never_, she thought to herself_. Let's get it over with._

"Yes, Will," she replied to him, turning towards the door, surprised at the calmness of her own voice. "Come in."

When he entered, he was wearing his dress uniform, with his jacket buttons undone, formality abandoned. He was also carrying a decanter of wine and two crystal glasses in his hands. She thought she noticed his hands were trembling, but she put it down to a trick of the light.

"Wine?" she asked him curiously. "What's the occasion?"

"No occasion," he answered calmly, sitting on the edge of the bed and pouring a glass from the decanter. "I just thought it would be nice to end the perfect day on a happy note, that's all."

She looked at him intently. Something was different about him, but she could not quite place it. He seemed so relaxed, so calm, although once again she thought she noticed his hands shake ever so slightly as he poured the wine carefully into the glasses.

_Perhaps he is happy about his impending marriage, and wants me to celebrate with him_, she thought, a feeling of apprehension building in her. _How can I pretend to be happy about something that breaks my heart?_

She left her table and sat down beside him, taking a glass of wine and looking up at his face. His expression was filled only with affection and trust, and she found herself lost in his blue eyes as she had been earlier that day.

"What shall we drink to?" she asked him.

"To the Galapagos. Let's drink to the Galapagos Islands," he said softly, clinking the glasses in a toast.

As he sipped the wine, he thought he would burst from the nervousness within him. His appearance was calm, that was true, but deep inside his heart was racing, thinking about how he could approach this situation. How do you tell the woman you have loved for so long how you feel about her? He hoped for something, anything, to give him inspiration, and he was thrilled when that inspiration came from Lucy herself.

"You never did answer me, Will, when I asked you about your offer of marriage," she said carefully, trying hard for the words to be as natural as possible. "Have you made a decision?"

He looked at her tenderly. "Yes, Lucy, I have."

_Here it comes_, she thought.

"I have decided to reject Miss Pemberley's offer."

Lucy looked up at him in amazement. What? Reject the offer? This was not what she expected.

"Why?" she asked him, stunned. "It would have been a good match, Will, very good for your family, would it not?"

He looked into his glass calmly. "Yes, it would, but that's not why I made my decision."

Lucy didn't know what to say. She was a mix of emotions, not knowing where to turn now that she had heard the exact opposite of what she was expecting. She pushed him a little further; she had to know why he had made this choice.

"But she is wealthy, yes? Worth over ten thousand a year, I hear. Imagine the life you could live if you had all that money, Will!" She was still trying to understand his answers, and at the same time keep her own emotions concealed from him. Underneath, she was screaming with joy, knowing that he was not lost to her, but still she needed to know the truth. There must be some reason why he had rejected the Pemberley girl, but what was it?

Will smiled. Now it was clear. Everything in his mind seemed to finally fall into place, and he felt more determined than he had at any time in his life that this was right. He gently brushed her cheek with his hand. Her skin was so soft, and it seemed to glow in the candlelight. "There are some things money can't buy, Lucy." He said gently, his voice filled with emotion.

Lucy closed her eyes. He had never touched her this way before. She felt her heart quicken, knowing there was more than friendship in his voice. Could this be? Could he really love her? Was this why he had rejected his father's arrangements? All thoughts melted away but the thought of him; this must be a dream, she thought, for reality could never be this wonderful.

She opened her eyes to find him gazing down at her, with a look that spoke only the deepest affection. She reached out and took his other hand, her eyes never leaving his.

"If you could have anything you wanted, Will. Anything in the world. What would it be?" She whispered.

He smiled at her, with a smile that betrayed his feelings, hidden for so long. "Do you really need to ask me that?" he replied gently, as his hand traced the line of her throat, down her shoulders and her slender figure, until he took her around the waist and drew her close to him. She thought her heart would skip a beat as she melted into his embrace. "I can't remember a time when I didn't love you," He whispered, ever so softly, as he pulled her closer. "There is nothing I wouldn't give to have you, Lucy. Nothing."

Lucy gazed into his blue eyes and smiled. The truth was finally revealed, and it filled her heart with joy. "Will, I have always been yours; you had but to take me," she replied softly, gently stretching her arms around his neck and kissing him tenderly.

It was like the stars stopped shining around them, instead shining their light only on Lucy and Will. The world could have ended then and there, and neither of them would have cared. She moved closer as he wrapped his arms around her, taking her into a passionate embrace, his kisses sweeter than chocolate. All their love, all their affection, had finally won through, and as they kissed they felt a rush through them that nothing could have prepared them for.

Will's heart raced. They were close now, so close. He gently kissed her neck, tracing the lines of her body with his gentle caresses as he softly whispered her name. She closed her eyes and felt his breath on her skin, sending shivers down her spine. She felt her own breath quicken under his touch, and she clung to him, not wanting anything to come between them. He felt her passions rise and pulled her even closer, wanting to feel every part of her. This was the most wonderful moment in the world, and they lost themselves completely in its perfection.

As he held her close Lucy knew this was right. Nothing else mattered. She needed him, she knew it. So many years of waiting were over, and she would not let this night end without being his completely.

"Make love to me, Will," she whispered softly. "Stay with me tonight."

He looked into her eyes, his expression filled with the deepest affection. He brushed her soft, dark hair away from her porcelain face and smiled tenderly. "I had no intention of leaving" he whispered back, as his lips met hers once more.

For Lucy, that night was a dream, a beautiful dream. She remembered his hand gently removing her shawl, and untying the ribbons on her dress, letting it casually fall to the floor. She remembered the warmth of his skin, his heartbeat against hers, the softness of his touch. She felt him move with her, inside her, all around her. The tenderness of his voice, the passion of his kisses, took her to another world. He was her first, and all she could see or feel was his love and tenderness, taking her away to heaven in his arms. She truly felt like a woman in his embrace, and when she arched her back, feeling his breath quicken, hearing him call her name, she suddenly came to know a pleasure she had never known before.

For Will, it was the realization of all his dreams that night. He held Lucy, and loved her, with more emotion than he ever knew he possessed. He gave her his all, and thought of nothing but making her happy. He knew she had never been here before, and that so much of her pleasure depended on him. He took up the challenge, giving everything he could to her, anticipating her desires, reading her emotions. When he heard her whisper his name he felt his own passions overcome him and bring him a pleasure that was beyond anything he had ever experienced. He loved her again and again, each time professing his undying devotion. She was his, this he knew, and he would always have her. No one could take away his Lucy, and he showed her through his touch that his love for her was deeper than even the wide, blue ocean they called their home.

* * *

When the sun finally rose that morning, she woke to find him lying beside her, gazing down at her with a warm smile. 

"Good morning, my love" he said softly, kissing her forehead.

She smiled back at him. "I was afraid I might have been dreaming" she whispered to him, putting her arms around his neck and kissing him tenderly.

"No, it was real. It was all real" he replied softly, brushing her hair from her cheek with his hand gently, just as he had done the evening before. "I love you, Lucy, and now you know it."

She paused for a moment, then laughed. "How could we have been so stupid, Will" she giggled. "I love you, you love me, and all we ever did was talk about the weather and ship rigging!"

He smiled at her observation. "Yes, we are rather pathetic, aren't we? Still, that won't happen again, will it?" he said, moving closer to hold her and kiss her with more insistence. "Now you are mine, Lucy, and I am yours". His voice was deeper and huskier now, revealing his sudden passion. She wrapped her arms around him, moving underneath him, kissing him tenderly, feeling his heartbeat start to quicken as it had the night before....

Suddenly there was a voice from outside the tent. "Lucy, are you up yet? I thought you were coming on our trek with us?"

It was the doctor. She had indeed promised to accompany him on his walk to investigate the islands, and although her heart wanted to stay with Will, her mind told her that this was something she needed to do.

"Yes, doctor, I will be with you shortly," she called through the canvas. She looked up at Will; his disappointment was obvious, but he knew Lucy well enough to understand that although he may be her first love, her second was the chance to sketch and observe the natural world, and that this was a chance which was too rare to abandon.

She began to speak, but he put his finger against her lips to stop her. "It's alright. I know you. I know how much you have been looking forward to this. Go, Lucy, enjoy yourself. I'll still love you, you know," he added, kissing her tenderly.

Lucy smiled at him, grateful for his understanding. She jumped out of bed and threw on a skirt and blouse. Will watched her rush around the tent, looking for her sketch pad, her pencils, her favourite shawl, all the while smiling at her as she went. She noticed his grin and turned to look at him, bewildered.

"What are you smiling about?" she asked him curiously.

"Nothing, nothing at all," he laughed.

Lucy found her shawl and her sketch pad, and juggling them awkwardly, she moved towards the door. She paused and looked back at Will. He was still lying there, smiling warmly at her. He was everything she could ever hope for, and now he was hers, and her dreams had been fulfilled. She put her materials on the edge of the bed, and sat beside him, reaching down to kiss him.

"I love you, William Mowett, and don't you forget it!" She whispered with a smile. With that, she took up her sketching pad and tools, and left the tent, humming softly to herself.

Will lay back, smiling happily, reflecting on the perfect night that they had shared.

At least now he had an answer for his father.....

* * *

_That was so much fun to write, I loved it. It's mushy and it's corny, but it's just gorgeous! I hope you liked the way it turned out. I tried to make it work in the imagination, and I think it succeeded, at least for the girls! I especially liked the short but sweet encounter the next morning....Please review and let me know what you thought!_


	19. Chapter 19 Ramifications

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: For all you Pullings fanatics out there, you may not like this chapter, but the story has to have some realism after all! He's actually doing Will a favour, ok??!!_

Chapter 19 – Ramifications

The day had dawned bright and fair, with only the odd patch of cloud occasionally blocking out the brilliant sunlight. It was mid afternoon, and the camp had been a rush of activity, with a large portion of the crew taking part in yet another game of cricket.

William Mowett, Lieutenant and Second Officer of the _HMS Surprise_, was pleased. Very pleased. He stood on the rocks not far from the camp and looked out to sea, a content expression firmly plastered on his face. He felt the sea air on his skin, and felt a rush of freedom and happiness overcome him as he closed his eyes and reflected on the past few days, and how perfect they had been.

She was his. Finally, Lucy had known of his feelings for her, and to his surprise and elation she had reciprocated them. She had fallen into his arms that night, giving herself completely to him, professing her love for him, now and always. He smiled to himself. Nothing could have prepared him for how perfect this was. The woman of his dreams had loved him, just as much as he loved her, and he knew that life would never be the same again.

Lucy had long left the camp in the company of the doctor, Mr Blakeney and Padeen, in search of the natural wonders for the Galapagos, and the doctor's mysterious flightless cormorant. It tore him apart when she had left that morning, but she had kissed him tenderly as she departed, her smile warming his heart. "I love you, William Mowett" she had said. He never realized before just how good it could feel to hear her say those words.

He had risen not long after she had departed, quietly dressed and left her tent, long before the crew had risen, in the hope that no-one would notice him leaving the lady's abode so early in the morning. He quietly made his way back to his own quarters, not realizing that Tom Pullings had awoken early, and was standing a little way from the camp, enjoying the morning air. He watched his friend leave Lucy's tent not long after the lady herself had exited, and could not conceal the smile on his face. Will and Lucy had finally admitted their feelings, it would seem, and Will had spent the night in her company. Tom was thrilled; his two dearest friends, so long in love, were finally together, and nothing gave him greater joy.

As the day wore on, Tom had hoped to speak with Will about the events of the evening, but his own errands kept the two friends apart. Now, with the sun slowly setting, Tom had finally found some time for himself, and sought out Will, who was standing near the shore in deep reflection.

"Will, how are you this afternoon?" Pullings asked him.

Will turned to Tom and smiled, a happy, relaxed smile. "I am excellent today, quite excellent."

Tom returned the smile. "I haven't had a chance to speak to you all day," he said, "and I have been meaning to."

Will looked at him intently. "Yes, I have wanted to speak to you, too. I have made a few decisions in the past couple of days which may interest you."

"Oh?" said Tom casually.

Will looked out to the sea before him. The sun was reflecting off the waves as they crashed into the rocks far beneath them. "Yes, about the Pemberley engagement arranged by my father. I have decided to reject it." The words felt good as he said them. Very good.

Tom looked at his friend with an expression of mild amusement. "Yes, I thought you were going to say that," he said knowingly.

Will turned to see Tom smiling broadly; he obviously knew more than he was revealing.

"How did you know?" he asked carefully.

Tom's smile grew broader. "I thought it may have something to do with you leaving Lucy's tent early this morning," he said, looking Will straight in the eye.

Will paused, a smile slowly creeping onto his face. He looked down at the rocks beneath him sheepishly. "I didn't think anybody had seen me."

"No one else did," Tom replied, "only me. I happen to be up, and happen to see you, that's all. So all went well then, with Lucy?" he asked, his eyebrows slightly raised.

The two friends looked at each other for a moment, and Will finally laughed. "Of course it did," he said happily. "You were right, Tom, she did love me. I don't know why I didn't see it before."

"Because you were blind, that's why," said Tom, patting Will affectionately on the shoulder. "You couldn't see the wood for the trees!"

Will sighed. "Well, that's not the case any more. We spent last night together, and I know she is the one for me." Will looked at Tom steadily. He decided to share his thoughts with his dear friend. So many had been filling his mind ever since he had first taken Lucy in an embrace, and he longed to tell someone of his decision.

"I am going to ask her to marry me, Tom."

Pullings expression changed slightly, to one of mild concern. This was something he did not expect to hear, and he knew he must approach the topic carefully.

"Will," he began slowly, "I know you love her, but do you really think that's wise?"

Will was taken aback by his friend's question. Tom was his best friend in the world, and knew how much he loved Lucy. Now that the two lovers were finally united, why would Tom be concerned if they were wed?

"I don't quite follow," said Will, puzzled.

Tom paused. "Well, it is very well to love the lady, and be close to her, perhaps very close to her..." he coughed uncomfortably. "You know what I mean. Anyway, what I mean to say is....well....is marrying her the best thing for your career?"

Will was speechless. This was something he had not considered, and had not thought was relevant, but the tone in Tom's voice showed that he believed in its importance, and this did more than a little to shake Will's resolve.

"I know it's not what you want to hear," Tom continued, "but if you are going to be a Captain, do you really think Command will want Captain with a...well...a strong willed, independent woman on his arm? Could it count against you at the Admiralty?"

Seeing Will's alarmed reaction, Tom's expression softened. "Will, you and Lucy are my best friends in the world," he said gently, putting his hand on his friend's shoulder, "and I want to see you both happy. But wouldn't it perhaps be better not to make this relationship official, at least not yet? What will your family say if you reject the offer of the daughter of Lord Pemberley for...well...for a common girl, a surgeons mate at that? Come to think of it, what would Lord Pemberley say if you knock back his daughter for Lucy? It's one thing to say no to a marriage completely, but to reject Elizabeth Pemberley for Lucy Carrington, that may just seal the lid on your chances for promotion, my friend."

Will stared out to the ocean. He had not thought of this before, and did not quite know what to say. He was well aware that this speech was not easy for Tom, as loved both Lucy and Will dearly, but some of what he was saying rang true. Could it count against Will, a wife like Lucy taking the potential place of a Pemberley? What would it mean to his chances of command? Tom was right about one thing: Lucy was not your average woman. She was more independent than most Regency ladies, and she was not afraid to speak her mind. Perhaps the Admiralty may feel that a Lieutenant should have a very respectable, quiet, well bred lady as his partner if he were ever to be made Captain. Not only that, but Lord Pemberley could have a direct influence over his chances for promotion, and replacing his daughter with a surgeon's mate, no matter how perfect she may be to Will himself, may be enough of a slap in the face to the Admiral to keep Will at Lieutenant forever. Suddenly, as he considered these possibly consequences, he found himself a lot less sure of his decision than before.

He was considering his reply to Tom when the two men heard the sound of voices, not too distant, desperately calling their names.

"Will!" "Tom!" "Mr Pullings!" "Mr Mowett!"

Lucy and Blakeney were running down the steep hill towards them, as fast as they could. Stephen was languishing behind, Padeen carrying the doctor on his strong shoulders.

"Sir, sir!" Billy shouted to both Pullings and Mowett. "It's the _Acheron_, sir. We have seen it!"

Tom and Will stared at the pair in disbelief.

"It's true," added Lucy, out of breath. "On the other side of the island. It's the _Acheron_ alright." She paused and looked at Will. Even in her exhaustion she managed to give him a warm smile, which he returned just as warmly.

Tom was already going over their words in his head. His expression grew serious, and he rose himself to his full height.

"If this is the case, we must speak to the Captain. I have a feeling we will be leaving the Galapagos today. Come on."

With that he walked purposefully towards the camp, the others struggling to keep up with his long strides. There was little time, and they must make a move lest the French privateer be lost again.


	20. Chapter 20 Propositions

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: Another Adult Content warning. This chapter is not as lovey dovey as Chapter 18. Rather, it contains some pretty direct language, and consequently is not suitable for the young ones with no knowledge of....ahem....the burning desires of men._

_PS – I added the Calamy thought as a comic relief!_

Chapter 20 – Propositions

"Davies, don't drop any more of those bloody cannon balls, for God's sake".

At first, Lucy thought she was dreaming, but gradually she realized that the voices she heard were indeed coming from the corridor outside the cabin. She slowly stretched and opened her eyes, looking around her. Everything was as she remembered it the evening before, with one small exception – Will was no longer lying beside her.

She lay back on the pillow and smiled as she looked around the dimly lit cabin. She had never really seen Will's cabin before, at least never this close, and she smiled at the familiar trinkets he kept in his possession: a tiny portrait of his little sister, Charlotte; his favourite emerald cuff-links, a gift from his late grandmother; his leather bound volume of original poetry, with the white quill resting gently against an open page. They said so much about him, and yet they could never paint the whole picture. No, only Lucy knew him that well; well enough to preempt his thoughts, and anticipate his desires, and well enough to spend the night in his bed.

Last night had been such a night. The ship had left the Galapagos the day before, setting sail with the tide on the hunt for the _Acheron_. Lucy had been assisting the doctor with his collected specimens until late in the evening, when she had retired to the women's mess room to reflect on the events that lead her to this place, on her night with Will, and what it all meant to her future. When the other members of the crew had retired to their hammocks she began to feel her own weariness overtake her, and she left the room on the way to her quarters. To her surprise she met William in the walkway, heading to his own cabin. They said nothing; their eyes said all that needed to be said. He had taken her hand and kissed it tenderly, all the while a burning passion behind his gaze. Without a word, he had led her silently along the empty walkways of the berthing deck, and down the narrow passageway that lead to his cabin. He had opened the door and she had entered, unbuttoning her blouse as he closed the door behind them. She knew what he wanted, and without a word he took her into the most passionate embrace, holding her close, his touch and kisses confirming her thoughts. They had made love that night, as they had on Galapagos, but this time it was different; this time it was more passionate, more insistent, more sensual, than the night before. This time he had whispered her name with a confidence that told her that she was his. This time he had shown her a love she never dreamed could be more than a fantasy, and she never realized that anything in this world could bring her so much pleasure. This time they were truly lovers, and any anticipation or nervousness that may have been present the night before was gone.

Lucy smiled. Yes, last night was wonderful, but something was different about Will. He seemed to be holding something back from her, almost as if he was considering his next move. He had been tender and loving, but still it seemed that there was something else he wanted to share with her, and for the life of her Lucy could not figure out what it could be.

The voices outside the cabin were constant now, and made Lucy more than a bit concerned. She knew she must leave Will's cabin, but how could she do it without being noticed? _It would not be right for a lady to have spent the night in the company of one of the officers_, she thought as she found her blouse and skirt, casually discarded on the floor in the heat of passion. When she had dressed, she carefully put her ear to the door to listen for a break in the activity, allowing her to make her escape. After several minutes the voices stopped and the footsteps faded, and Lucy saw her chance. She quickly turned the handle to the tiny cabin and opened the door, slipping out into the narrow walkway.

Right in front of Barrett Bonden.

"Oh, excuse me, Miss Carrington," he said, unable to contain his huge grin, "I didn't see you there." The last thing Barrett expected was to find Miss Carrington in this corridor, at this time of the morning, and leaving Mr Mowett's cabin at that.

"Sorry, Barrett," she said absently, rushing past him in an attempt to flee the scene as quickly as possible. She inwardly shuddered. Now the entire crew would know, she thought, and there was nothing she or Will could do about it.

Lucy made her way through the passage ways, crewmembers scurrying around her, preparing cannon balls and flints, and sharpening swords. The lower decks were abuzz with activity; clearly the Captain was anticipating a close quarters battle, and soon. But how? Lucy recalled as she headed towards the sickbay the comments of Will and Tom, and of other members of the crew, about the _Acheron_ being a superior ship, out of their class. How on Earth did Captain Aubrey hope to take this stronger, faster ship? She decided to alter her course and head to the upper decks in an attempt to find someone who could answer her question.

When she reached the top of the fore stairway the deck was full of busy sailors, undertaking a range of varied and rather curious tasks in the soft dawn light. They were replacing flints in the pistols and muskets, hiding swords, removing insignia from every item on deck. She also noticed that the Union Jack was gone, and that a white flag with a black diamond – the flag of a whaler – was flying high over the _Surprise_. Something was definitely going on, and she needed to know what it was.

She headed towards the quarterdeck, seeing Will near the helm, loading pistols in preparation for the ensuing battle. He did not see her approach as she quietly made her way along the deck, dodging rushing crew, until she mounted the Quarterdeck stairs.

For a moment she stood behind him, watching his every move. Her thoughts drifted away from the activity around her, and back to the night before, when he had held her so close, his touch so tender...

Billy Blakeney and Mr Calamy were assisting him, and it was Billy who was first to notice her.

"Good morning, Miss Lucy" he said cheerfully.

Will immediately turned around; even in this dull light, she was still so beautiful, he thought to himself. He smiled, and replaced the pistol he was loading into its box.

"Good morning indeed, Miss Carrington," Will said to her as she casually moved closer to him. "I trust you slept well?" he asked her, a cheeky smile passing across his face.

Lucy smiled back at him. "Why yes, Mr Mowett," she lied confidently, knowing full well that the last thing on both of their minds the night before was sleep. "Although I must say I am a little confused about all this activity. What's going on?"

Will's expression grew serious. He took her arm gently and led her to the stern, away from the curious ears of crew and midshipmen.

"We are disguising ourselves as whalers, my love," he told her quietly. "It was the doctor's idea, apparently, although I don't know how the doctor could have thought of something like this. A phasmed, I think he called it," said Will, clearly puzzled by the word.

But Lucy knew better. She reflected on their collection of specimens and remembered the phasmed, that little stick insect they had found on a twig on the Galapagos lava flow. It was a fascinating find, and was now clearly of as much interest to the Captain as it was to the doctor.

_The Surprise, a phasmed_, she thought to herself. _Indeed!_

"Anyway" Will continued, "we are preparing to take her, Lucy. It's a great plan - I only hope to God we are successful." His gaze drifted away from her out to sea, his concern evident.

"I am sure we will be," Lucy smiled, taking his hand. "After all, with such brave officers under his command, how could Captain Aubrey possibly fail!"

"Don't joke, love," he chided her, his expression serious. "This will be a very nasty battle, and I don't want you anywhere near it, do you understand?" His tone was gentle but firm; he knew that Lucy would want to be part of the action, and he was deeply concerned that she may be harmed.

Lucy sensed his worry and smiled sweetly. "I understand, Will. I promise to stay out of harms way. There, does that make you happy?" With that she leant in close and kissed him, as if to reassure him that she was telling the truth.

At first he seemed shocked that she had kissed him, here on the deck, in full view of the crew, but after his initial shock passed he had to admit to himself that it actually felt very good, to express this emotion for the lady in plain view, without concern for the consequences. Besides, nobody had seen them, as the crew were busy about their preparations for battle anyway.

For Will, consequences were all that had been on his mind since they left the Galapagos. He had listened to Tom Pullings words, and had grown unsure of whether marrying Lucy was the right thing to do or not. Tom had told him it was better to wait; that if he were to reject Miss Pemberley and marry Lucy, it could ruin his chances of promotion, and keep him at Lieutenant forever. He had also heard Tom's words about his family, and their reaction to a marriage to Lucy. Will knew his father well enough to know that the old man would be furious, and could very well disown him if he even considered bringing shame on his family's good name. Will had considered these things, and nothing else, for much of his night watch, until he had finally been relieved and made his way to his cabin, only to find Lucy in the corridor outside her mess room. At that moment, all thoughts disappeared but the thought of her; he had taken her hand and lead her to his own quarters, without a word, and had made love to her with a passion that made his decisions even harder to make. He knew when he held her how much he loved her, and how much he needed her. Nothing would make him happier than to know her not as Lucy Carrington, but as Mrs Lucy Mowett, the woman who would be by his side for the rest of his life, but still something stopped him from asking her. He had kept his thoughts to himself all night, instead concentrating on loving her and giving her his undivided attention.

Now, as they stood on the deck of the Surprise, speaking of the impending battle, it suddenly occurred to him just how dangerous this situation was. The battle would be fierce, and bloody; there was no telling what was about to happen. He may be wounded, or worse yet killed, and although he thought it unlikely that this would be the case, there was always a chance that he would not come back to her. He looked into her dark eyes, and suddenly the desire to marry her was overwhelming. Suddenly he realized how short life really was, and that any life was not worth living without her. She was beautiful, she was intelligent, indeed she was a lady, and deserved so much more than being relegated to the lowly position of his mistress. No, that would not do, not for his Lucy. The hell with the Admiralty, and the hell with his father. His mind was made up.

"Lucy, something has been on my mind," He began quietly.

Lucy gave him a measured look. "I know, Will," she whispered back. "I could tell last night that you were thinking about something. What is it?"

He took her hand, glancing down at the deck uncomfortably. She noticed that his hands were suddenly shaking. What was this? Was there something wrong? Was it all too good to be true? Lucy held her breath, preparing for the worst.

"Lucy, I love you, you know that, don't you?" he said in a half whisper.

She smiled. "Of course I know it," she laughed, "and I love you."

Will smiled in spite of his nervousness. "I know," he continued. "I have loved you for so long, and wanted so much to be close to you. Now that we are close, I don't want anything to come between us. Not now, not ever."

He looked into her eyes, and she could see his nervousness, but also his deep affection, and it sent a warm shiver up her spine.

"Lucy, will you marry me?"

Her heart stopped. It was only for a moment, but she was quite sure it actually stopped. She stared at him in shock, seeing the look of anticipation on his face. For all their affection for each other, Will still did not know if she would accept his offer, and he bit his lip as he waited patiently for his proposal to sink in.

For the first time in her life, Lucy was speechless. _Marry him? He wants me to marry him? Surely he must be joking_, she thought to herself.

"Will, do you know what you are saying?" she finally said. "You are asking me to be your wife. Do you have any idea how bad that would be for your career?"

He stared at her, dumbfounded.

"You know I love you," she told him. "I love you so much that my heart doesn't belong to me anymore, it belongs to you, and always will. But my dear William, if you reject the daughter of an Admiral for a surgeon's mate, your passage to Captain will come to a grinding halt."

She put her hand fondly on his cheek, seeing his shock at her response. "My darling, I would love nothing more than to be your wife, but I would never want to be responsible for stopping you from fulfilling your dreams," she said softly. "They are just as important to me as they are to you, you know."

Will couldn't recall a time when he was ever this shocked. He had asked Lucy, the woman he had loved for so long, to marry him, and she had told him the exact same reasons not to that he had heard from Tom Pullings. This was wrong, all wrong. How could he convince her that he didn't care about promotion, or being a Captain, anywhere near as much as he cared about her?

He took a deep breath in an attempt to gather his thoughts. "Lucy," he said calmly, "I love you. It's that simple. I love you, and nothing will ever change that. I don't want you to be my mistress, Lucy, I want you to be my wife. I would give up my family, my wealth, the Navy, everything, if it meant I could spend the rest of my life with you. You are worth too much for me to treat you any other way Lucy. Let me be your husband, and give you the life that I know you deserve to live, the life of the lady that you are."

His speech touched Lucy's heart in a way she did not expect. She looked at him with affection, and had to admit to herself that being his wife was the most wonderful thing that she could ever hope for. She started to believe that this desire, this secret desire she had kept in her heart, could become a reality, and that she could share her life with him as a true lady should, and not hiding in the shadows, sneaking to his cabin in the middle of the night like a cheap strumpet.

"Do you really mean that?" she asked him softly. "Perhaps it would be better to wait a little longer, until the Pemberley offer has been forgotten, before we make our relationship official? God knows I love you, Will, but don't give up everything for me; I'm not worth it!"

He smiled, forgetting his surroundings, and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. "My darling, you are worth more than anything in the world to me, and I would never settle for anything less than making you happy." He whispered, kissing her softly.

Mr Calamy, standing near the helm, dropped his pistol with a thud. He stood there, mouth agape, staring at the Second Officer and the Surgeon's Mate, wrapped in a passionate embrace on the quarterdeck.

_So that's what you can do when you're a Lieutenant_, he thought to himself. _Cool._

Lucy pulled away from Will's embrace when she noticed Calamy's stare. Billy Blakeney also saw the pair, but simply looked on with a smile, quite possibly the widest smile Lucy had ever seen on his tiny face. She returned his smile warmly, before turning back to William.

"We will discuss this later, Mr Mowett," she said fondly, patting his cheek. "I am sure you have work to do. Besides, I have wedding plans to make", she added quietly, her smile giving away her intentions to accept his offer.

Lucy turned away from him, meaning to leave the Quarterdeck bound for the sickbay, but she paused. She turned back to see him still standing there, the shocked expression still plastered on his face.

_She said yes_, he thought. _She actually said yes_!

She gazed at him warmly, but her expression slowly went from one of affection to one of concern. She approached him once more, taking his face in her hands tenderly.

"Will, for God's sake be careful. I don't want to lose you now, not now that you are mine," she whispered, knowing that the impending battle would see him in close combat, and that his life could well be in danger.

Mowett smiled. "I will be careful, my love, and so should you," he said, kissing her again softly.

With a smile, Lucy turned and left the Quarterdeck, thrilled at the thought of a shipboard wedding.

Now they would have to wait to be reunited until after the battle, whatever its outcome.


	21. Chapter 21 The Acheron

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: This chapter was probably the hardest to write, but also the most satisfying. I think it ended up having the desired effect, at least for me! Prepare thyself...._

Chapter 21 – The Acheron

"Let Fly!"

The call had come from Captain Aubrey, and the crew of the _Surprise_, until this moment disguised as whalers, had removed their costumes to reveal their Royal Navy uniforms. The Marines had come out of hiding, the Union Jack had been raised, and the muskets, loaded and ready, were eagerly taken up in preparation to fire.

As soon as the call had come, the _Surprise's_ cannons had started firing. Tom was leading the gun crews, aiming at the main mast, firing in a rapid succession which shook the _Surprise_ to its beams. As the last cannon was fired, a great cracking sound was heard, and the main mast of the _Acheron_ collapsed into the still water at its side.

The _Surprise_ had turned, turned in a flash, and the starboard battery had been fired, just as quickly as the port before it. The damage to the _Acheron_ was extensive; with little time to return fire, they had sustained massive damage, and the deck was littered with dead and wounded French sailors.

The _Surprise _was alongside the _Acheron_ now, the French frigate floundering like a beached whale, and the Captain had given the order to board. Tom Pullings had come to the deck where he had met with Will, and the two now prepared their own divisions to board. Tom swung across the stern of the _Surprise_ by a loose rope from the _Acheron_'s Mizzen mast which was wounded in the cannon fire which brought down its forward cousin. Will followed him, pistol in hand, ready for the ensuing battle.

Lucy had emerged from below decks after the initial cannon fire had subsided, accompanied by Stephen, Mr Higgins and Padeen. They had made their way to the quarterdeck where they now stood with Billy Blakeney, who had taken command of the _Surprise_. They watched on as the crew had spilled onto the _Acheron_'s decks, Lucy's eyes firmly fixed on Will and Tom as they made their way across to the _Acheron_'s aft quarter.

All had been quiet on board the _Acheron_; not a movement was to be seen amongst the fallen, seeming to indicate that the ship had indeed been successfully taken. But then, without warning, the shout "Acheron" had come from the French quarterdeck, and the enemy crew had stood, muskets in hand, firing on their English invaders.

The ensuing fight was bloody, and fierce. Muskets, pistols, axes, and swords, all came into play by both French and English fighters. It was close quarters fighting, with no room for escape, and everywhere the sailors turned an attack from the enemy was upon them. Will and Tom had made their way through this war zone, slashing through Frenchmen with a ferocity that Lucy had never witnessed. She watched them both in the crowd until she lost sight of their blue officer's coats in the swarm of bodies around them.

Blakeney watched the action too, although his mind was firmly fixed on his duty – to protect the _Surprise_ at all costs. He scoured the decks of the _Acheron_ for any possible threats, suddenly noticing that one of the _Acheron_'s cannons was being repositioned to aim directly at the _Surprise_'s hull.

"They're aiming for our hull," he screamed, running down the starboard deck. "They're going to sink her." Lucy and the doctor's party ran behind him as he made for the small cannon on the _Surprise's_ deck. They repositioned the cannon as fast as they could, seeing that the _Acheron_ crew were undertaking the same action with their own cannon. They must fire, and quickly, or the _Surprise_ may be lost.

"Stand clear!" yelled Billy, pulling the cord and screaming "fire!"

Just in time. The side of the _Acheron_ was blasted away, revealing a mass of French crew around the other cannons, preparing for exactly the same action as their now dead companions had before them.

There was nothing else for it. "Arm youselves," cried Blakeney, "we must board them." He took hold of a pistol, as the doctor also took up a pistol and Lucy herself grabbed hold of a sword. She knew it was madness; she had promised Will she would stay out of harm's way, but this was an emergency. If she didn't board with the others, who knows what could happen. She made a split second decision: she could better defend the ship with the others than by staying on the _Surprise_, and with that thought she followed the doctor and Billy into the crumbled hull of the _Acheron_.

It was dark, but she could see enough in front of her to immediately assess the situation. The gun deck was awash with French and English sailors in close quarters action, the fighting fierce. Blood flowed freely across the deck, and all around her the shouts and calls of those in the fight, and those who lay dying, filled her ears. She looked to her left to see another pair of French sailors preparing a cannon, and knew what she must do. She leapt forward, jumping over the body of a sailor shot dead by the doctor, and immediately plunged her sword into the leader of the gun crew. The other man turned on her, picking up a sword lying beside him and meeting her next thrust with his own defence. Lucy was no fool with a sword; she had been on ships and around men long enough to learn the fineries of swordsmanship, and the French crewman was clearly surprised at her skill with the weapon. He thrusted, and she anticipated his move perfectly, dodging the blow and instead driving her own sword into his abdomen. He crumbled at her feet, crying in pain. She had no time to take notice of his death throes, instead she looked around her to determine her next move.

The doctor was a little way away to the aft of the _Acheron_'s gun deck, competently dodging the parries of a young French sailor – he could not have been more than 16 – while Blakeney was making quick work of the Frenchmen around him with his clever left handed swordsmanship. They were both coping fine, she decided. Instead, she turned her attention to the forward cannons, to find two of the _Acheron_'s gun crew preparing the farthest cannon for firing.

Lucy held up her skirt and ran to the end of the gun deck, dodging fighting sailors around her, until she came upon the two gun crew as they were repositioning the large cannon, directing it towards the _Surprise's_ hull. Unlike the previous encounter, these two men had seen the lady dispose of their crewmen, and were prepared for her advances. The first got to his feet as the other continued his action with the cannon, and, holding his sword in preparation, he and Lucy came together with a crash. She constantly met his advances, each time anticipating his every move, in turn putting him off guard. At one point he moved to grab her around the waist, but she dodged his reach, instead bringing her sword down on his right arm with a force that gashed it open to the bone. He dropped his own sword and gripped the wound, gashing blood furiously through his fingers. She turned on him and drove her sword through his chest, sending him to the floor cold.

The second Frenchman on the cannon did not stop. He was loading the powder when he realized that the lady was pointing her sword at his throat.

"I don't know if you can understand me," she said quietly, "but if you don't stop that right now, you're a dead man."

He stared at this woman, her blue and white dress splattered in blood, holding her sword with confidence, and visibly flinched. She knew she had him.

"Stand up," she said slowly.

He turned towards the cannon, shifting his body slightly as if to prepare to stand. Lucy noticed that he was without a sword.

She did not notice the pistol that was lying on the deck beside him.

BANG!

Lucy did not hear the gunshot. All she could see was black, and all she could feel was a cold chill, slowly running through her veins. She looked at the crewman, still kneeling before her, but now he was holding a smoking pistol in his hand.

At first she did not know what had happened, but she had begun to feel a strange sensation, like water running down her chest, which sent a shiver down her slender form. She looked down to see her blue and white dress in tatters, a huge blood red stain over her right breast.

Lucy lost the grip on her sword and sunk to her knees, her hands holding the wound in her chest. She looked up at the Frenchman who had shot her, disbelief on her porcelain face, and saw him shudder at the sight of her crumble before him. Her head fell, and she collapsed to the deck, her breathing heavy and laboured.

Blakeney had, at that moment, looked up the deck, only to see Lucy drop to the floor, her sword abandoned beside her. He had screamed her name, alerting the doctor to her situation. The two of them had run to her, no thought of their surroundings, the doctor reaching her and turning her over only to see the great mass of blood staining her chest.

Stephen could immediately tell that the wound was a bad one, and that there was little he could do, but he could not give up on her. He took her into his arms, cradling her gently, as Blakeney disarmed the dumfounded French sailor who had shot her. The crewman's eyes spoke only of sympathy and guilt, as he watched the doctor gently nurse Lucy in his arms.

Around them the fighting had gradually subsided, the French crew overwhelmed by the _Surprise's_ invaders. The gun deck was quieter now, and as the English crew had ceased their fighting they had looked around, only to see Dr Maturin, lying near the port cannons, cradling a wounded Lucy Carrington in his arms. Their disbelief was obvious; almost in a daze, one by one they had begun to approach Lucy, unable to believe that the lady had been in the thick of battle, and had now been mortally wounded.

Maturin looked at Blakeney, who had a wild expression in his eyes.

"Mr Blakeney, send word for the Captain," said Stephen calmly, although his expression showed his deep concern.

Blakeney ran, ran faster than he had ever run, searching for Captain Aubrey. He found him in the _Acheron_'s sick bay, taking a sword from the ships doctor.

"Sir, Sir, it's Miss Carrington" he said in a panic. "Sir you must come quickly."

When Aubrey arrived at the gun deck, Lucy's situation had worsened. She was breathing heavily, occasionally coughing up blood, and no longer able to support her head as she lay in the doctor's arms. She was dying, and Stephen was torn apart from his inability to help her. He looked up at Jack, deep emotion in his eyes.

"I think somebody should fetch Mr Mowett," the doctor said quietly.

Aubrey stood for a moment as the scene sunk in, before turning slowly to Blakeney who was now standing beside him.

"Mr Blakeney, find Mr Mowett, and for God's sake hurry" he said to the stunned boy.

* * *

William Mowett was standing on the main deck beside Tom Pullings, a group of French soldiers in their custody. Will and Tom had stuck together in the heat of the battle, inflicting many wound and suffering a few of their own, although none of their wounds were serious. Now the two men were supervising the prisoners on deck, making sure they had been disarmed and restrained, when Blakeney came running along the deck, screaming Will's name.

"Mr Mowett, Mr Mowett! Sir! You must come! You must come now!" His expression was frantic, and he took hold of Will's arm in a desperate attempt to drag him away.

"Billy, calm down" he said to Blakeney, addressing the boy as Lucy did in an attempt to stop his evident panic. "What is it? What's wrong?"

"It's Miss Carrington, sir! Please, you must come quickly!"

Will's blood suddenly went cold. What could have happened to Lucy? Without a word he followed Blakeney at a flat out run, descending the stairs to the gun deck, Tom Pullings hot on his heels.

When he reached the deck he could see the crowd of _Surprise _crew, standing around the forward port cannons. When he reached them they silently melted out of his way, revealing Lucy, his Lucy, lying on the floor in the arms of the doctor, covered in blood.

Will felt his heart stop as he dropped his sword and bent down to her side. He looked at her face, her beautiful features contorted from pain, and thought he must have been in a nightmare. He glanced up at the doctor, seeing the look of total loss on his face, and he knew that this was serious. It was then that he noticed the great mass of blood on Lucy's dress, coming from the wound on her right breast. She had been shot.

Everything was black before his eyes. All he could do was take hold of her, drawing her out of the doctor's arms and close to him, cradling her head against his chest. He did not know how it had happened, or why. He did not care. All he cared about was Lucy, and what would now become of her.

"Will," she whispered, her voice straining. "Is that you?"

He tried to smile, but could not. "Yes, love, it's me. Don't waste your energy, you have to fight, Lucy. Stay calm and everything will be alright."

She managed to smile weakly. "No, Will, it won't," she said softly. "Not this time. I am not a fool, I know a mortal wound. I am a doctor, remember?"

She started to laugh, but the pain was too great, and instead she crumbled in his arms as he drew her closer. She closed her eyes, trying to steel herself, and gradually her breathing became less laboured. She opened her eyes to look at him, a look of trust and affection on her face.

"Will," she said softly. "Tell me you love me, once more before I die."

Will felt the tears start to well in his eyes. "You won't die, Lucy, you'll be fine. The doctor will save you."

He looked up at Stephen. The doctor's expression, filled with the deepest sadness, told Will that there was nothing he could do.

Lucy gazed up at Will tenderly, finding the strength to lift her hand to his cheek. She saw his tears, and gently brushed them away.

"Don't cry for me, my love," she whispered. "No matter where I am, you know I will always be yours." She paused, trying to gather her strength. "Please, Will, tell me you love me. I need to hear it, one last time."

He looked into her dark eyes, filled with pain. He brushed her hair away from her face as he had done so many times before, gazing down at her with the greatest affection.

"I love you, Lucy. Dear God, I love you so much. Don't leave me, please don't leave me," he said, his voice drifting off into nothingness as he felt the tears run down his cheek.

Upon hearing his words, she smiled, and closed her eyes. Her strength left her, and her hand dropped to her side, her breathing laboured once more. Will felt helpless; there was nothing he could do but watch her die. He sat and held her, gently rocking her slender lifeless body, all the time feeling his own body go numb from the pain and shock that overwhelmed him.

Suddenly her breathing became more rapid, and she raised herself in his arms, her eyes tightly closed from the pain. As the rush subsided, she slowly lowered her frail body, resting against him once more. He thought she had stopped breathing, when she calmly opened her eyes and looked up at him, an air of peace in her beautiful face.

"I would like to have been Mrs Mowett," she said quietly, a perfect smile lighting her porcelain features.

With that, her head rested gently against his chest, and her eyes closed for the last time.

Lucy Carrington was dead.

* * *

_Come on, you must have seen that coming! I have to admit, after I wrote it, I read it and I cried. How sad is that! I love these characters, especially Lucy, and killing one off was actually incredibly difficult to do. I hope I made you cry, too. :o( _

_Stay tuned - the story is not over yet, although we are reaching the conclusion, at least of this novel.....oh dear, I feel a sequel coming on.....!_


	22. Chapter 22 Farewell

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: The final, heart wrenching chapter. The verse is an original composition. It seemed fitting to include reference to one of Mowett's poems in a way that was relevant to the story, which is why I have waited until now.  
  
Join me as we say goodbye to Lucy Carrington......_

Chapter 22 – Farewell

The deck was quiet. A graceful albatross darted effortlessly amongst the _Surprise's_ sails, but nobody noticed it. Rather, all eyes were fixed on the bodies being prepared for burial at sea, as they were being stitched carefully into their hammocks.

Along the deck many shipmates recognized the faces of friends who had lost their lives in the _Acheron_ battle: Mr Allen, young Midshipman Calamy, Joseph Nagle, Michael Doodle. Their faces were peaceful, their eyes closed. One by one they were covered with respect, and eerie silence shrouding the scene as though the ocean had suddenly become a great Cathedral.

A little way from the line of bodies was a small group of women, silently stitching a hammock of their own. Kitty pulled the cord through the holes slowly, her face giving away her deep sadness. Little Maggie was in tears, the other handful of ladies gently comforting her, whilst trying to come to terms with their own heartache. Between them, the lifeless body of Lucy Carrington lay peacefully in her hammock, stitched carefully into its embrace. It could have been a trick of the light, but she seemed to have a gentle smile on her beautiful face.

William Mowett, Lieutenant and Second Officer of the HMS _Surprise_, stood on the deck, silent. His eyes were fixed on Lucy, and the women who tenderly cared for her. He could not think; thoughts were lost to him. All he could see was darkness, and all he could feel was pain. He looked at her calm face and remembered her smile, her laughter. He remembered her wit, her grace, her elegance. He remembered the day they first met, when this pretty girl had, to his surprise, climbed without assistance from the crew boat onto the deck, her arms ladened with bags of medical instruments. He remembered seeing her emerge from the lower decks of the _Surprise_ so many times in the past, her red shawl wrapped around her delicate shoulders, and how on that one sunny day it had touched his heart, and he had realized that he loved her. He remembered the look of total affection and trust on her face that night on the Galapagos, that night they had made love and professed their undying devotion. Finally, he remembered the look of pain on her face as she lay dying in his arms, and her final words to him: _I would like to have been Mrs Mowett._

He closed his eyes. He remembered all of these things, and yet he remembered none of them. All he could do then was watch her die, and now, all he could do was stand, numb and motionless, and watch her being put to her final rest. Everything was lost to him. His life, his love, his future, were being stitched into a hammock with the woman of his dreams. She had died, and his heart had died with her. Everything swirled around him. Uncertainty, sadness, fear, pain. Everything he had ever held sacred, every promise he had made, every triumph he had ever achieved throughout his life, all of these things were nothing; nothing without her. As the stitches were being pulled gently through her canvas coffin, he saw his hopes and dreams shatter before him, stitched into a hammock with the only woman he had ever truly loved.

In all of this pain, he managed, briefly, to find his strength and his courage, and approach Kitty before the last stitches were in place. She looked up at him, the deepest sadness and sympathy in her eyes, as he silently knelt next to Lucy's lifeless body, his heart in pieces.

"Not yet," he said to Kitty quietly, straining to keep control. "There's one last thing that needs to be done."

He reached into his jacket pocket and removed a piece of paper, its edges torn and frayed. He had carried it with him since their final day on the Galapagos, when he had sat at his book of poetry and silently written his thoughts; thoughts of their picnic, thoughts of their night of passion, thoughts of what it had meant to finally tell her that he loved her. He held his breath as gently unfolded the worn parchment, silently reading its contents for the last time:

_She stood, radiant, amongst the waves,  
Framed by the golden sun above,  
Her smoldering eyes, her raven hair,  
The one I cherish, the one I love._

_She took my hand and gave her love,  
With sweetest looks that stole my heart.  
She told me she would e'er be mine,  
That come what may, we'd never part._

_She melted into my embrace,  
Her touch so warm, her love so true.  
Now I know, my darling Lucy,  
I know my heart belongs to you._

Gently folding the paper once more, he carefully placed it inside her hammock, next to her lifeless body. He had nothing to give her; no trinket, no pendant, no jewel, that could come close to what she meant to him, except for these words - these words he had written about his Lucy, when, after so long, they had finally found eternal love in each other's arms.

The funeral was short, but moving. The crew was silent and respectful, reciting the Lord's Prayer with a feeling and emotion that was evident. Slowly, Captain Aubrey began to read the names of those who had lost their lives in the _Acheron_ battle, and the faces around him fell with the loss and grief that touched them all.

Will did not hear any of them, until the Captain reached one name on his list:

"Lucy Carrington, Surgeon's Mate."

He closed his eyes. His sadness overtook him, and though he tried with all his might to control it, he felt the tear slowly running down his cheek. She was gone, his Lucy, and now it truly came crashing home to him that he would never look upon her beautiful face again.

In his pain he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned his head slightly to find Stephen Maturin standing beside him, sadness and pity in his eyes. Stephen had felt Lucy's parting deeply; she was his student, his friend, but also the closest thing he had ever had to a sister or daughter of his own. It was heartbreaking to lose this beautiful woman who had become such a stable and important part of his life, although he never realized until she was gone how important she was to him. He had watched her grow, becoming the independent, intelligent, beautiful woman that she was, and had watched her fall for the Second Officer who so easily stole her heart. When the two had been united, he was thrilled that Lucy may finally have found true love, and hoped that he would live to see them grow old together. Now that she was gone, he felt a strange but strong bond with William Mowett, as the only other person on the ship, indeed in the world, who knew Lucy Carrington as well as he did. Now, standing at his side, Stephen had put his hand firmly on Will's shoulder, to comfort him, to give him strength, to tell him it would be ok. Although to Stephen the gesture seemed hollow, he knew that somehow, in some way, he must be there for this young man who had made his student, his little sister, so happy near the end of her short life.

Will felt his resolve crumble, and he bowed his head quietly. He knew that nothing would take away this sadness, and he felt his dreams disappearing from his grasp as he heard the heart- wrenching sound of the bodies leaving the deck, making their way to the bottom of the ocean forever.

She was gone.

* * *

The breeze was gentle, but strong enough to bellow the _Acheron'_s sails as she made her way slowly south west. Tom Pullings was at her command, his orders to take the prize to Portsmouth. Will watched the ship pull away to the aft of the _Surprise_, conscious of his best friend's absence. It had ripped at Tom's heart when Lucy had died, and now, the thought of leaving Will when he needed his friend the most had hurt Pullings deeply. Yet Tom knew his duty, and with sadness he had left Will, and taken his grief for Lucy and her death with him to his new command. 

Slowly the Acheron moved further and further out of Will's view. Yes, he was conscious of Tom's absence. He was also conscious of his own position: he had been elevated to the position of First Officer now that Tom was gone, and he stood at the helm of the HMS _Surprise_, second in command, guiding her on her steady path back to the Galapagos.

He closed his eyes and felt the breeze. It revived him a little, but his body still felt numb from the pain of the funeral days before. He reflected again, as he had these past few days, on Lucy, his Lucy, and what her loss would mean to him. He knew nothing of the future, now that she was gone, and all he could see when he closed his eyes was her face, her eyes, her smile, every beautiful feature, as he had known them for so much of his life.

Will sighed, opening his eyes. To his surprise, there she was, Lucy Carrington, standing beside him, a smile on her porcelain face, as though she had never gone.

"_No matter where I am, I will always be yours,"_ she said to him softly, deep affection in her dark eyes.

He smiled back at her, suddenly feeling his sadness disappear. At that moment, he heard a call come from the forward deck.

"Mr Mowett to the Great Cabin."

It only distracted him for a second, but when he turned back, she was gone.

Will looked wistfully out across the crashing waves, and for the first time in days, he smiled. Though no image, no illusion, would ever take her place, he realised that Lucy Carrington, although she was not beside him, would always be with him. She would always have his heart, and nothing could ever change that.

With that thought he took a deep breath, turned, and headed to the Great Cabin, to the orders of Captain Aubrey, and perhaps another adventure.

An adventure without her.

* * *

_That's it! I really hope you enjoyed An Ocean of Secrets. I have to say that, considering it's the first time I have ever written a full length story like this, I am pretty darned proud of the way it turned out! If you have not already, **please please review** the story and tell me what you thought. _

_I am currently working on a sequel to this story, called Abbotsleigh Park. It follows the adventures of Mowett and Pullings, and is being published here on fanfiction, so make sure you check it out!_

_Again, thanks for reading! Huzzah for Mr Mowett!!!!!_

_Luv ya's all!_

_Miss Flossy!! xxxxxx_


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